you
you
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This is limited, so come on down, come on down February 12th, noon PST or 11 a.m. PST for Patreon, members.
But I'm just being lazy today, I've been being lazy today. Yep, same price ranges last time. You already know how we do it around here. I've been being so lazy today.
I still am a little tired from my colonoscopy shit, so a common side effect of colonoscopy
stuff is low blood pressure, and I went to do a, what's it called?
What's it called?
I'm a fuckin' ham, like girl.
I did a, like a trial appointment, like introduction appointment with, um, uh, personal trainer.
Oh my God!
Like, let it out!
What a personal trainer.
I did like the trial with a personal trainer today and it was a consultation.
I always forget that fucking word.
A consultation.
God damn it!
And so she took my blood pressure and she was like, it's a little low.
You feel okay?
Did you eat before you came here?
I was like, and mind you, I felt totally fine before that.
I was like, yes, am I okay?
And then of course I started to get a little lightheaded
because I started freaking out.
I was like, but my blood pressure's still a little low
because of not eating and not drinking
and then going under anesthesia and whatever.
So needed a few days to recover.
So I'm still being a little lazy today.
I thought that I was gonna be out
and about doing more things today, but no.
So, take it slow, take it slow, when I don't mind, every little, little, little, little, little, little.
Yeah, so, so we're just gonna hang out for a little bit.
What did your ring say?
Avery.
Drink lots of water from a nurse.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, nurse. Um, but yeah, so everyone just make sure you're
drinking water is make sure you're staying hydrated. I always drink a lot of water,
but I feel like my body is was just that should just took my body out like that should
just took my body out also wait can we like guys I wanted to be in a Super Bowl
commercial why did no one ask me to be in a Super Bowl commercial I wanted to be in
that how cool would that have been dang it I want to be in one next year for
sure should I start making you know people are doing the thing where they're
making the jingles they're making the jingles for brands maybe if I start
thinking of one now they'll put me in they'll put they'll give me one for next
year okay maybe for let's do Gatorade
Gatorade
Gatorade it will get you laid Gatorade it will get you laid whatever flavor
Fuck I can't think of anything.
Mrs.CMI with the 25 gifted, thank you Mrs.CMI with the 25 gifted.
Woo!
Thank you Mrs.CMI.
Thank you, thank you.
Okay
Okay, well we'll work on that we'll work on that one
You'll work on that one a cease and desist there behave Julian
Julian I saw a clip of you talking about
Someone in your chat was like what if you taught Katie Riley and vanilla how to do jiu-jitsu and I thought that would be a fun
That'd be that would be fun
Um, is Jiu Jitsu the one where they're like this?
Cause if so, I think I'd be kinda good at that.
Julian, yes. Exactly.
Okay, I think I can do that.
I think I can do that.
Anything where I don't have to stand up, I think I'd be br-
No, but um...
Yeah.
I would be down to try that.
Or something, so let me know
No, I know you have to stand at some point but some point they do be on the ground rumbling and tumbling so
Then you do be on the ground rumbling and tumbling, but then I feel like I'd get scared and then I'd like fart
I feel like I get scared and fart, so I don't know
Like I'm all twisted and turned like oh, I don't know I'd be like
I'd be scared. So I don't want to know if I want to do that. I
Don't know if I want to do that, but
We'll see we'll see but I am trying to do new things I am trying to do new things
So it's all part of my it's all part of my
Exposure therapy if you will I'm debating on starting a YouTube series centered around that
So we'll see maybe maybe that's that'll happen in the new year
doing like a YouTube series set like
Around like the idea of like vanilla tries things vanilla tries this vanilla tries that
Sense like but it's it's all around like an exposure therapy kind of a thing
Then I can be kind of fun, huh?
Wouldn't that be fun?
so
And I think about that kind of things are things to think about and you're things to think about in the new year
These are things to think about in the new year also guys. I have another goal
But aren't you like not supposed to tell people your goals because then they make him not
True or something
Or what
Bad juju the evil eye
Yeah, maybe I shouldn't say that then
That's wishes. Oh. Oh, okay. Okay, never mind. Then I could say it then. Okay, guys, my therapist was like, I feel like you have a very good sense of like self worth and stuff and I feel like you're very like, you know that like, stuff is good and you're like a, you're like a happy person.
But I feel like maybe you're you're not feeling
Fulfilled I was like what yes, I am and then I was like
Maybe maybe there is more maybe there is more that I could want to do
And the one thing that makes me so happy is cats like I just love cats
So much and I do think that I would want to do something
like involving cats one day.
Like I wanna open up a cat place someday.
So I wanna do something like that,
but it has to have like a fun twist on it or something.
Like I want some sort of cat sanctuary.
Just want a bunch of cats running around
and everyone can adopt them
and I could help a bunch of cats.
And I feel like that would just make me so happy.
Cat rage room what grab what wait? No, no
So yeah
So I want to do something like that. I don't know but I the thought of that just made me really excited and happy so I
Think that'd be something to be to be
In the next couple years maybe to think about putting some money into so yeah, yeah
I thought that would be cool, I thought that would be cool, but yeah, yeah, um, Cat Gaming
Cafe, okay, I'm gonna have to start writing this down, nobody's stealing my idea, well
Y'all those ideas, but that might play that could be kind of fire though
I'm thinking I'm thinking so yeah anyway um I
Just just love cats. I just love cats so bad. Just love cats so bad
Love cats so bad
Random stream random stream
The catcade mmm now we're cooking
Vanilla's pussy palace, okay, and that sounds like a strip club if I open a strip club that
Strip club, but there's also cats there. There's strippers, but there's also cats Vanilla's pussy palace
Okay, okay
Okay boots with the fur boots with the fur
Boots with the fur.
Vanilla's Pussy Palace Boots with the fur.
Write that down.
Write that down!
Write that down.
Who said cats nips?
Write that down.
Okay, no.
But I think that could be cool.
I think that could be cool.
There's like an area where it's strippers
And there's also an area where it's just like a cat cafe. Maybe pink breeze with the five gifted
Thank you pink breeze with the five
Probably have to keep them in separate areas because you don't want somebody accidentally stepping on a cat and some eight inch pleasers. So
You don't want that happening that would not be good that would not be good
Um
Pee-pee poo-poo with the $50 don't know might I suggest vanilla mace's big natural kiddies?
That's also a good one too. I'm also liking that one as well write that down as well
Thank you so much pee pee poo poo for the $50 don't know write that down vanilla mace's big natural kiddies
write that down
Alex, James with the $50 dono, Yiro, or Yiro, Yiro, I never said it correctly, Yiro, Yiro Diarrhea Boy here.
I know you are an Overwatch player, but they are collabing with Sanrio. What?
I thought you should look up the skins on YouTube. Maybe even play Prop Knot, I know, RIP.
Love you, Queen. Okay, well, you do have my attention, so I do want to see that.
So I do want to see that Sanrio overwatch skins. I do want to see that
Okay, that's pretty freaking adorable. Yeah, that's actually pretty freaking adorable dare I say that's pretty good
That's pretty good. I
Don't know who any of these people are it is one of is one of these two or three mercy
That's all, that's the only one I know.
Which one?
The blonde.
Baby, which blonde?
Her?
That's what I thought.
If I had to put my money on it, I would have said it was bomb bomb.
Cause okay, I played Overwatch like a handful of times and I played as Mercy before.
Oh, and then D.Va is my Melody.
That's cute.
Widowmaker is Karomi.
Cinnamonroll is Kariko?
Kariko?
Cute!
That is so fun. Juno is Hello Kitty. That is so fun.
They knew- they knew not to do this in Rivals because they knew not to do this in Rivals because I would have threw up and passed out.
They knew not to do it.
They knew not to do that.
But that is really cute. That is really cute.
Who you rooting for in the Super Bowl? I am rooting for
Seahawks is that the thing not the Patriots is the other one the Seahawks
And bad bunny
Well, that's really all I'm going to watch. I just I just I just I'm gonna watch for the Benito Bowl
Um
So yeah, we'll see whoa Jacqueline rose with the 10 gifted. Thank you Jacqueline rose with the 10 and
Everybody loves live with the five. Thank you Jacqueline and everybody loves live. Thank you guys
Bonito ball
So, I did see the cat with the jet pack thing, I did see that, Vivian Westwood has cat clothes,
I thought that was AI.
Yeah I fear that's AI, yeah I fear that's AI, somebody tagged me in that too.
It's not real, it's not real.
Yeah, unfortunately.
But you already know if they did come out with cat clothes,
I would be buying some for my children.
I would be buying some.
Everybody loves live with another five.
Thank you.
Everybody loves live with another five.
I kind of wanna play like, I don't know.
I wanna play like something silly.
like something silly.
I wish there was like a new fun silly game.
I wish there was a new fun silly game.
Like something new, something new and fun.
Something new and fun and never been done and seen before.
She was don't play with that egg.
Don't play with that egg.
Squirrel stapler. What the hell is a squirrel stapler?
Okay, so I don't think I want to play Squirrel Stapler. I don't think I want to play Squirrel
Stapler. Thank you. Thank you for the suggestions, though. I don't think I want to play Squirrel
stapler okay maybe let's see what if there's anything related like don't stop
girlie pop what the hell is this
you are in there
and you
are in there downfall
experience the rush that everyone's talking about
don't stop girlie pop in the world
first wife you take girlie pop arena style
movie shooter
that is out now
wait i gotta live
you're gone
go all dinner
I kind of love this since those big dumb robots dude came barging into town
they've been sapping the planet of all its love
I said it always are and a highly dangerous to share all the value
what the hell this is cute
Wait, this shit is fire! That looks fun. Don't stop, girly pop! That's cute.
I don't know let's just like look around like I don't want like a shooter game though I don't
want to shooter I don't want to shooter game.
fun, silly, easy.
Maybe some sort of simulator, maybe?
Wasn't there, okay, was there another squirrel one?
Squirrel with a gun?
Oh, I feel like we've looked at this one before.
Okay, maybe not.
Okay.
Like something in this realm though, like something in this realm though.
You know what I'm talking about pink breeze with the $50 don't know.
Hi, Vanilla, you mentioned self worth.
And that's one of the things that I admire from you.
I've been trying to do a healthy things for myself to work on myself, like the
gym, et cetera.
But anyways, love you clean and everything that you do for us and what
you represent.
Thank you pink breeze for the $50 don't know.
Hey
Everyone should want to be the best version of themselves
Everyone should want to be the best version of themselves, and I'm glad that you are working towards that as well. Thank you pink breeze
Goat simulator. I feel like didn't we play that one time?
Goat simulator Beth kins with the five gifted. Thank you Beth kins with the five wait. Have we played this now like I don't have this
Okay.
Oh.
Okay.
Okay.
Bye.
Bye.
Okay, okay, so
That's an option. That's an option the baby in yellow. I did see a few people say the baby
the baby in yellow
Good morning and welcome to your first day at crown child. Oh, wait. This looks like fun
I'm liking this already.
I get to work as a day care?
The fuck is wrong with him?
Hello!
Oh this looks fine!
Oh.
Okay I don't know he's silly.
This sold me. This sold me. Let's play this.
I don't even want to know the rest of it.
I don't even want to know the rest of it. I'm just going to do this.
this I don't I don't want to be I don't want it to be spoiled okay cool let's
uh let's let's play the baby in yellow he kind of looks like me so I've been
feeling maternal towards him already I feel a little maternal towards him
already
No, we haven't redone the Life is Strange Marathon yet, we'll probably start the Life
is Strange Marathon after my Valentine's Day party.
So that's when we're going to probably start that.
So in like two weeks we'll start the Life is Strange Marathon before the new one comes
out.
I hope you guys are excited.
So enjoy the fun random games while you can because I am actually going to really try to
stick to the life is strange marathon schedule.
So enjoy this while you can because it's going to be sure.
Sure okay.
I don't know how I'd be like I don't know I'm bored I don't know how to play this.
That's the fun part about streaming is you can just do whatever you want.
Okay, oh
Just scared my god. Why did he look like that?
Yes, I love kitty powers matchmaker. I have it on the switch once I figure out how to set my switch up my new switch
Cuz I got the switch too. I will um. Oh, it just goes right into the game
Like what about hi? How are you? My name is like I'm gonna move the chat up here make it a little bit bigger
Okay, like right into the dang baby game, but yeah, so
Okay, there's different acts and parts.
Okay.
All right.
Act one, babysitting.
This is crown child care.
Act 1 babysitting.
I'm really excited for my first day at the job.
Uh-huh.
Okay.
Okay, easy. So I just got a babysit him. I just got to feed him.
Oh, I got snow. I was about to say. Find apartment 10.
This is apartment six. Can I? Okay. Find apartment 10.
Okay. Sorry, I'm just breaking it. Seven. Hello? Good night.
Okay.
Eight.
What's that noise?
I'm hearing something ticking.
Is this 10?
Nine, 11?
Well, baby, this has to be 10.
Hello?
Oh, check under the plant pot.
Wait, so y'all tell me you left the baby here alone?
Oh.
Because I'm about to call somebody like I that's okay okay wait so on the top
left part of my screen it says secret zero out of 12 and outfit so I guess I
can unlock other outfits oh my goodness I can dress him up oh okay I kind of
I don't like the princess one, the bee.
I think I'm gonna do the princess for now.
Okay, oh my camera's a little too big.
Okay, yeah, I'll make it a little bit smaller.
I think I'm gonna do the princess for now.
Okay, night one, the sitter, it's time for bed.
The child, is that what you think?
Okay.
Hi! I'm your babysitter. I'm just going to go get your bottle and I'll be right back.
And I don't know why your parents would just leave you here, so I'm a little scared.
Okay.
Can I have a little slice of cheese, maybe?
Oh, okay, sorry.
I accidentally put the cheese.
Okay, just making sure he's still there.
Can I make myself a sandwich?
Hold on, wait, I mean, because there's, here is your bottle, little baby, okay, that's
got to be some sort of baby IBS or something, because that just ain't right.
That just ain't right.
That really ain't right, okay, um, okay, okay, take baby to the changing table, changing
table where would that be in the bathroom yes okay oh okay let me lay you can I lay
you better that's not really how you're supposed to be like okay get a new nappy
um where does your mommy keep the nappy oh lay down lay down you're gonna fall
wait is this a hint free a soul a soul trapped by the baby and yellow has been
set free fuck do you mean he's trapping souls okay I'm gonna go find a nappy I
found one
What the fuck is wrong with you fuck did you get over there hold on I'm gonna set another
soul-free. Big head mode unlocked. Hey, big head. Okay. No, don't get irritated with me.
You need to be changed before you go to bed. Okay. Now you're all good.
I saw someone in the comments say it.
I didn't know if it would really work.
I'm sorry.
Though he looks sad now.
Do you want to know some more milky?
Here, hold on.
You want some bread?
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, okay, let's go upstairs come on
Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry that was an accident I did not mean
That's fun, right?
He liked that!
He liked that, right?
Oh!
Oh, sh- he liked that!
The key to secrets!
Oh!
Oh!
Wait, I found a key to the secrets.
Wait, hold on, baby.
Um, where would that- where do you think this key would go to? The key to secrets?
What?
Uh-huh, okay.
Well, outside the fog rolled in as the cloud waves roll and break on the walls.
Oh, the sin of such innocent eyes.
Clear as crystal, understood by the ignorance and why is alike
more precious than jewels,
pursuing the music more awful than death.
What the fuck?
As I fell, I knew that the baby in yellow had opened their tattered mantle, and it was only God to cry to now.
Okay, well that was about you. Um...
This must be your room. Oh, it is so cute in here. Look at how cute your little stuffed animals are.
How adorable it is in here. Okay, I'm gonna put you down really. Oh, sorry
I'm sorry to put you down gently. I'm sorry. That was my my was my fault. That was my mistake
Well
Fun I want to put this in the bed with you. Do you have your rabbit?
Free a soul, okay, I'll free another soul.
What was that?
Was that you?
That's it, that little guy?
Oh, I have to free two more souls to unlock the toy box.
I do want to unlock the toy box, so...
Um, let me try to find two more souls.
Hmm.
Let me try to find two more souls.
Let's go look around a little bit more for some more souls.
What was that? What was that? Hold on, something was in the picture frame.
What the fuck was that?
I know you saw that.
Baby, I know you saw something weird in the picture frame when we walked by what was that I?
Don't like that
Okay, and don't look at me with that sad face. I'm trying to find some more souls to free
Mysteries of the see anymore, baby
Doctor's gift
Do I like come back to this level oh Jake raid
Jake raid. Thank you Jake for the raid. We're just
decorating this with this baby
decorating a Christmas tree and just just babysitting this little guy and
Who knows what could happen? Oh, yeah, I could open these hold on
Ah, another soul.
Hide.
Okay.
Okay.
All right, let's put you to bed now because I can't find any more souls.
I can't find any more souls, so let's go to bed.
Find the storybook and sit down.
The prince and the cat across the shore in distant lands, with dark stars overhead.
The prince was fast asleep until a cat jumped on his bed, like no, because I'm going to
do it, because I'm the babysitter.
I found a secret garden," said the cat with much delight.
Excitedly, they ran outside, explorers in the night.
They walked through the golden garden gate.
Look at the pretty trees.
They walked along the pretty pebble path.
Look at the colorful flowers.
Okay, that should have rhymed, and so that kind of pissed me off.
They walked past the fabulous flowing fountain.
Look at the dancing water.
Look, look, look.
Wait, it's the it's the
It's the peace that's in his room and doesn't he have the cat too
And he's wearing yellow
But the prince didn't like the garden and started kicking down the trees
He dug up flowers grab the hedges and pulled off all the leaves
He ruined everything for fun the cat watched on in fear what a mistake I made the cat cried out
I should have never brought him here
That's a bad story baby that wasn't oh, he's not the fuck out
Good night. Oh, he liked this story though. Okay, bye, baby
Okay, there's like a green thing
Okay, I'm going to take this with me, because I feel like I need this for something.
Okay, bye baby.
Wait for parents, watch TV on the sofa.
Okay, cool.
I'm going to take this with me.
Okay, where could this go?
Is there somewhere with the green?
I'm just gonna put that there.
Chill out on sofa.
Whoa.
Oh, shit.
Damn.
Where the fuck are the parents coming back?
Settle baby.
Don't worry, babe.
Don't worry baby, I'm coming.
Hold on.
Are you just looking around for clues?
What if I just left?
Oh, okay, I can't.
Alright, just, oh I'm watching him for three days?
Oh, is that, oh yeah, you're right.
I forgot about that.
I did say three days, right?
What was that?
Was that already open?
Baby?
Look, I told you there was weird shit on that picture.
You saw it, you just saw it happen, right?
You just saw it.
So no bruh oh my god okay this is no one saw it oh my god I need I needed to do it again
I needed to do it again I'm telling you something something's wrong with that
How the fuck did you get down here?
How did you get down here?
Wait right there.
Something weird is happening with this picture frame, and everyone doesn't see it, and they think I'm the crazy one.
Look! Look at it!
Did you see it now?
Hmm.
I told you.
The killer.
Alright, come here, baby.
You know what? Actually, no, baby.
I'm taking you up to this fucking weird attic room,
because I'm not going up here alone.
Oh, I can't take him.
Baby?
Oh, I can take him. Okay.
Um, okay. Care to explain?
Care to explain. Oops, sorry.
Baby, where are we?
What the hell is this?
The painting seems to be incomplete.
Oh my god, shut up!
All right, so should I finish it?
I'm a good artist. I could...
I could finish it, I think.
Wait, wasn't this like in the picture in the book?
Baby, what's supposed to...
Okay, let's go back down there.
I think it's the chess piece.
Maybe.
Okay.
go back to bed okay put the correct plushie okay um do you want the butt
do you want him because he was the one in the book right I knew you were gonna
like him I knew you're gonna like him okay um all right see ya
hold on I'm gonna go
Hmm, okay.
Hey, where'd the chess piece go?
What did I do with it?
What did I do with the chess piece?
Where'd I leave it?
on the stairs by the photo? Oh you're right.
Dang it.
Alright, I'll take this with me.
Okay, let's see.
What the hell is even that?
Weird.
Okay.
And let's watch some more TV.
Why am I just watching ads?
Night 2, the child laughing, look, look, isn't it funny?
The sitter, I told you not to do that.
Okay.
Night 2, get bottled from the fridge, where's the baby?
Oh, are you having fun watching TV?
TV? You like the TV? The Adventures of the Very Scared Little Rabbit.
Oh, it's the only show that's on.
Okay, I'm gonna get your bottle.
Look, he loves it.
He loves it.
Okay.
Oh, okay.
Right. Okay, so...
Uh, hold on, baby. The bottle is somewhere in here.
And I have to find it. Oh, found it!
That was so silly, wasn't it?
Oh, okay. He's ready to eat. Okay, there you go.
Okay, figured that was gonna happen.
Okay, let's just change you again. Get your diaper. What the fuck? Get the fuck-
get back here! Oh my god! What the fuck is wrong with this stupid diaper? Hey! Oh my
Oh my god. Get over here.
Little piece of shit. Stop it!
Don't go up the-
We're not supposed to be in here.
We're not supposed to be in here, Dipey.
In emergency break glass.
Oh, geez.
What have we got in here?
Bedtime routine, bottle prep snacks, needsitter, coloring, okay, they're an artist, seems a
little bit creepy.
Oh, maybe they're the author of the book.
It looks like they might be the author of that book that we read.
Okay.
Okay, let me close that.
There you go.
Okay.
I know what the hell just happened with that freaking diaper.
Baby?
Hey.
What happened there?
You okay?
You okay?
What happened there?
You okay?
You okay?
The soul was on the desk.
Oh, there was a soul on the desk?
Fuck, okay.
Hold on.
Oh, sorry.
Where?
Okay, now I can do the toy boxes.
Okay.
You want to play with some toys?
Oh, let's play with a train.
Okay.
even a balloon? Is that fun? Look, that is so much fun. Okay, maybe a doctor.
Oh, okay, maybe a foam dart gun.
Is that fun, baby?
That's fun, huh?
He likes that.
He likes that.
That's just our way of just having fun.
What about a block and a plane and a Zubikar and a Xylophone and a question mark?
Baby, what should I do about this?
I'm just going to leave that in there, baby.
Put it back.
Got it.
OK.
Xylophone and Zoomie car.
We didn't try those yet.
airplane.
The baby just...
Okay, that's fun.
Fun.
Fun. Fun. Okay. Let's clean up. Cool. Okay. And time for you to go to bed. Find the story
book, The Prince and the Rabbits, a new book today. That rabbit looks scared. When the
When the rabbit came to visit, the prince said time to play, but his big red eyes they scared
her and she didn't want to stay.
Quickly towards the exit, the tiny rabbit hopped, the prince ran right behind her and screamed
she must be stopped.
Son of a bitch!
Son of a bitch!
The fuck was that?
My fucking god.
Here.
I need to finish the goddamn book.
Continue reading, okay.
Vanilla's left eyelash with the
$50 don't know.
Hey girl, what do a bottom and an ambulance have in common?
Don't know. Hey girl, what do a bottom and an ambulance have in common? They both get loaded from the rear and go woo-woo
Anyways, I know you don't play overwatch, but have you seen the overwatch ex-Sanrio collab thought you thought of you when I saw it?
Thank you
Thank you, but I was left eyelash for the $50 don't know and actually somebody just don't know about
20 minutes ago saying the same will not not the joke about the bottoms and the ambulance but about the Sanrio
overwatch collab and we looked at it and it is really cute um but thank you
vanilla thank you vanilla's left eyelash for the $50
don't know that was a good joke i like that i like that one
thank you so much oh shit okay let's get back in the chair
okay get the book get back in the chair okay anyway as we were saying
through the dark corridors dark corridors
Through dark corridors he chased her hop hop hop a relentless futile fight hop hop hop
Round and round inside the palace in and out of space inside hop hop
The print
Wait, what flight what did I say something wrong?
The prince he couldn't catch her his heart was filled with rap
Hey, those were the things that we just saw in the toy box
The prince he couldn't catch her, his heart was filled with wrath.
The rabbit slipped right out the door and vanished down the path.
The prince cried out, I need new friends, more, now another.
I'll bring you some, don't worry now, replied his loving, caring mother.
Okay, he liked it.
All right, so that's good.
Baby, did the sheep and the cat always look this sad?
I don't remember them looking like that.
They always did, really?
Aw.
OK.
OK, chill out.
Watch TV on the sofa.
OK, this time it says chill out with a smiley face next to it.
So I'm a little scared.
Okay, I'm gonna use that.
Nothing like chilling out watching TV on the sofa.
What the fuck is here at this hour? I can't use the peephole?
The Toasty 4000? Wait! I've been seeing the ads about those.
What happened?
Oh, oh, I can't even go in there, okay.
I guess I'll just...
The hell?
Night 3. Good night, sweet dreams. I will show you my dreams.
Oh, more! I think I'm gonna die in this house.
BUCKETS, SHIT, BUCKETS, SHIT, BUCKETS, BUCKETS, okay, let me balance it first, okay, BUCKETS,
Buc-its?
Hit the number zero?
Girl, I'm trying.
Oh, I just had to click the number zero?
Oh.
Okay, oh my god bucket central over here. I'm so good
Didn't realize that's all I had to do
I'll leave it. I'll leave it there
Don't worry, baby
What happened?
That's it?
Okay.
That's all you needed?
All right.
Find something to eat.
Perhaps a cheese toasty.
Oh!
I get to try the toasty?
Oh, I already took it out the- where is it?
Well, where's the toasty?
Oh, this is it.
Oh!
Oh my God.
Cheese toasty.
Okay, so I do a piece of bread, I'm gonna do cheese, I'm gonna do ham, I'm gonna do
onion, I'm gonna do mushroom, I'm gonna do tomato, I'm gonna do pickle, and I'm
I'm gonna do a lot of pieces of cheese.
Feed the baby, you monster, it says.
Okay, um, yeah, oh, okay.
We'll do.
Here, ooh.
Um, hello?
It's really cold in here.
Oh, it's just out of reach.
Shit.
Okay.
Okay, I'm gonna get there.
Okay.
Uh...
It's a maze.
It's a maze.
Ah, got it.
Okay.
Now all I gotta do...
Now all I have to do...
is just get back to where I was.
Easy.
Easy peasy lemon squeezy.
Oh, what the fuck is r-
Here you go!
Uh, okay.
Baby, why do you look like that?
I shouldn't- I shouldn't have let you out of my sight.
Okay. Yeah, you tried it, baby. You tried it, baby.
Yeah, he tried it.
Man, fuck you, baby!
Break the emergency glass upstairs.
Oh, wait. I still have to change the baby, though. That was still on my...
Okay, maybe not anymore. Okay.
Um...
Okay.
Move!
Where is he?
Fuckin' he go.
And they better not- okay, it went-
Ooh, no I didn't- I didn't go.
I didn't go.
I didn't go.
And they better not okay, I went oh no I didn't go fast
They y'all tried to warm me didn't you I know
The baby
Chill out go the fuck to sleep
Correct plus she may be the sheep
Yes, okay. Let's read him his book. The prince and the sheep. It was cold throughout the
palace, the moon shone bright outside, the wind it blew in blue. Oh no, the curtains
flew open wide. The little prince was in his bed and couldn't get to sleep so he called
out for his mother please go and find my sheep. I am thirsty said the prince so the
sheep fetched a drink. I am dirty said the prince so the sheep changed his clothes.
Am I the frigging sheep? I am tired said the prince. Let me count you. One, two,
three. Just one more thing said the prince before I drift to sleep. He
opened up his big red eyes and turned to face the sheep. Come join me in my
My dreams stay forever in my head, obediently the sheep stepped forth, its mind consumed
by dread.
Master?
Oh!
Who the fuck are you?
Is that your real name, baby?
Yeah.
Who the fuck are you? Is that your real name, baby?
Am I about to be one of the damn stuffies?
Good night, I guess.
Okay.
Sorry, is the game volume really loud? I could lower it.
Nice.
Okay.
Great.
That's awesome.
Oh, and we got a dono, gay L monkey with the $50 dono.
Okay.
So you can spend three days with this bug-eyed looking baby, but not your own.
I'll be waiting for the child support in the mail.
Okay.
Monkey.
We had our differences.
We had our differences, but we are back together as a family again.
Okay.
We are back together as a family again.
We are back together as a family again.
Okay?
Thank you, monkey, for the $50 don't know.
Thank you, though.
I do appreciate you, monkey.
Mommy will see you soon, I promise.
Okay, mommy will see you soon, I promise.
Someone goes so no toasty.
Dan, can I get that toasty, though?
This is Crown Child Care.
The gold standard in babysitting.
You have one new client message.
Is this a-
I'm a-
I'm a new babysitter!
I'm a new babysitter.
And I- we- we all work for this company.
This mom knows that baby's killing them though.
Why does it look like Silent Hill in here?
Oh, because this is the aftermath of the first.
Where's the baby?
Oh, fuck!
Oh, I don't want to do it again, shit.
Okay, well I guess we have to.
Nice, new high score, okay.
We find the baby.
Ooh!
It looked really nasty in here, baby.
Nice, new high score, okay.
We find the baby.
Oh, it looked really nasty in here, baby.
That's locked, that's locked.
Hello?
Right, okay.
Oh, he's out of here.
Right, so that would be my cue to leave if I were the babysitter.
Yeah, me and you both, buddy. Let's go. Come on.
Hey, wait! Hey!
Okay, let's go.
Don't worry, we're gonna get out of here. We're gonna get out of here, okay? I promise.
Okay, Pick Man's Madness quickly towards the exit the tiny rabbit hopped from the prince
of the rabbits.
Okay, we're gonna get out of here, we're gonna get out of here rabbits, don't worry.
Yeah, we're not getting out of here.
The fifth floor.
on the fifth floor.
Okay, that's at least better than the floor you were on before.
Hello?
Anyone?
Yo, there's a fucking crazy baby that lives in this apartment
building.
Y'all need to help me.
Somebody.
All right, come on.
Oh no!
Oh, this bitch.
Who the fuck?
I don't even know who this is!
Damn, this person...
Word for Best A View Album, Word for Rising Star, this could have been Katie's, dang it.
Okay, so...
Wait, they got all the weird s-
Okay, so something's going on with this whole apartment building
Something's going on with this whole apartment building. Oh
Need music to play
That's not piano music because musical gibberish
How can I put it together
Okay, that's...
Hold on, baby.
I'm trying to figure this out.
Okay.
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
Hey!
Where did he go? Oh, here's another piece.
Hold on, baby.
Okay, I gotta find the third piece.
I was the third piece of the sheet music. Where would I be?
Baby, where is it?
Okay, that's just goofy. I don't want to hear that.
It was in the kitchen?
Yes.
The king's lullaby.
It's working.
He likes it.
I'm gonna play this I'm gonna play this on the on the
I'm talking with a banger already.
Got you!
Got you, bitch!
Bitch.
Is she kind of a banger?
See ya.
Fuckin' outta here.
And you're not coming with me.
Okay.
I'll get a banger.
Power's out.
Of course it is.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
powers out of fucking course it is okay what happened to bunny soon the king
arrives great
You leave that bunny rabbits alone.
Okay.
So we're still stuck.
Oh.
When did this get here?
What the hell?
Am I on the job now?
Where the fuck is this?
Don't forget, clock in and out.
Yo, the fuck? Like, where...
How are we at?
Ooh, let me get a, um...
Let me get a...
Let me take a C2.
What? I need money for that?
Oh my god.
Okay, I'm gonna have to collect some...
Some money.
Ooh, bag of chips.
Oh, he's got like a million fucking goons, okay great.
Ooh, it seems to be a little bit of a, okay, Locke 17 cat rabbit sheep, 17 cat, ooh, a toasty.
Okay, let me see what I need first out of there.
I feel like I'm going to need replaced fuses.
Okay, we need a fuse.
Okay, let me get a...
Let me get a C2.
Is that a fuse?
I feel like that's a fuse.
We got another one of those.
Oh, there's a soul in there.
Wrong fuse.
Oh, that one needs a blue one?
There is no blue one.
Where's the soul at?
Where was the soul?
Oh, it's like a piece of candy.
Oh, this is a fuse.
Yeah.
It's not a fuse.
Oh, kitty.
Okay, I have to find a blue fuse somewhere.
Oh!
Okay, be careful.
Okay, I will.
I will.
I will be careful.
There's a screwdriver.
There's a hammer.
Oh, right there.
That's your own fault.
That's your own fault.
Stop the baby stealing fuses.
Stop it!
Stay there!
I got you how am I supposed to stop him put him in the locker
Yeah, I think that'll work.
Fucking bitch
43 43 17
43 17
.
.
.
.
.
.
Okay, I had to though.
He's in the walls!
Oh, this one already has one.
Okay, he's gone for now.
Finally, well now I can pull the lever.
He's restored, returned to the elevator, hopefully it will work now, it says.
Oh, of course. Oh, of course, this is what's gonna happen.
Okay, excuse me. Don't leave.
I think I'm gonna... I'm hungry. You'll regret that.
Yeah, I'm hungry. I'm just gonna get some food. Me and the bunny rabbit are just gonna go.
Oh, I clicked the up button on accident. I meant to click down.
I was supposed to run?
Oh, shit.
Let me try that again.
Honey!
Oh, you gotta be- oh my god.
Oh my god, you gotta be- okay, it's flower.
I'm good, I'm good.
Bye!
Oh, okay, okay, that wasn't even fair I didn't even I wasn't even that close Alex was sobbing with the raid. Thank you
Okay, let's try again
Come on buddy, let's go look I'm faster than the damn bunny
Let's go, let's go, c'mon, what?
Oh my god, why did it drop it?
Okay, let's go, let's go, c'mon people.
C'mon people, let's go.
C'mon bunny, let's go. I'm trusting you bunny.
Let's go bunny, c'mon.
No.
We did it. We did it. Don't leave me alone. Stay here forever. Pastors, please. That's
his name. I told you that was his name. I told you that was his name. It's waiting for something.
What the bunny is?
I'll be right back, okay?
Don't leave me.
Why is everything backwards?
I saw that!
Don't think I didn't fucking see that.
You're coming with me.
You're coming with me because I saw that.
Who wants a dookie me loooove?
Oh, sorry. I'm sorry.
Um, it just smelled like mad on us.
Okay, go back in there.
I don't want to deal with you.
Fine.
Stay there.
I'm watching you.
Fucking bitch.
Okay.
What? Again?
Wait, I have a key though.
Wait, I have a key though.
Why is matching key?
Let's go to bed now.
Okay.
Uh, hold on.
Okay, um...
Okay, I think so it's two different worlds, okay, so I think I have to go take the key
then go down into the evil world.
Oh, bitch, they stole my key!
Wait, they broke it, Key.
Girl.
Okay, um...
So what should I do now?
I'm making you worried.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Come here.
Oh, is it the baby's room?
I thought it was.
Girl!
Okay.
It's broken.
Okay.
Okay, I'm understanding it now.
Okay, so I unlock this same door in the evil world?
Sorry.
Sorry.
Okay.
Okay.
Oh, cute.
Hi!
Um...
Nice seeing you here.
So now I need the key from the not-evil world, so now I go back downstairs, now I go back
into the normal world.
Because this one's broken, yeah, so I gotta go, okay.
That one's broken, so I have to go back.
back again I think. Back in the back again.
Okay, yup.
Okay I'm gonna go up here now baby.
Don't leave. That's what it says. Okay. Perfect. I won't actually move the camera.
So you all could like see the things that it's telling me.
He's a tired boy oh, he is he's so tired
He's so tired.
Where the fuck do you live, baby?
None of these?
Maybe this one?
Sorry.
Where the hell am I supposed to take you to?
Sorry.
Oh, I found it.
It's your room.
Here, you-
I found it.
I found it.
I found it.
I found it.
your room here you okay goodnight wait again the hell wait baby again okay let's
try this again. Don't put him in. I won't. I'm gonna take him with me. Or should I just
Wait.
Do I wait or take him with me?
Just keep going.
Take the baby to bed if failed.
Ooh, watch TV, you're feeling sleepy.
The fuck?
No, I'm not gonna watch the TV. No, I'm not gonna watch it. I'm not gonna watch it.
I'm not gonna watch it, baby. I'm not.
No
No, no, I'm not gonna look at it. Nope.
Nope, not even a little bit. Not even a little bit.
What? Locked. You mean locked.
Oh, no thank you, I'm not hungry, no thank you, okay, oh, okay, the TV is the baby.
Do I just keep going?
What do I do?
I don't want to start from the beginning.
Go without him?
Leave the c-
Okay.
Take the baby to bed again.
He's a very tired boy.
Oh, he's mad.
Oh, he's mad.
Bunny!
Whoa!
This is trippy, bunny.
Whoa!
Whoa!
Bunny!
Bunny!
Wait!
Bunny, no!
Bunny!
I have to go around.
Okay.
No!
Ouch.
Fucking hurt.
Oh.
What the hell?
Um, let me get uh, okay.
What's up?
Girl.
This big red one is your skin, there.
Since you didn't watch the skin.
Yeah, I don't want to fucking say. You're right.
The Ravage!
The round and round inside the palace, in and out of space and sight.
Yeah, that's what he did.
That's exactly what he did.
I need you, son, small but now, a mother.
Oh?
I need you, son.
And while you are...
Oh.
I'll be your son, and I'll be your mother.
Your blood is loving, gambling, mother.
Man, fuck his mother.
And if no one wants to fuck her, I'll do it.
Sorry.
Okay.
For the sake of the- for the sake of the universe.
Careful, you're a little fast there.
Okay.
Come on.
Get shut up! Look, I've had it with you. I've literally had it with you. Go the fuck to sleep.
Wait, actually I want to come up this time.
You know what? No, actually I want to throw you off the fucking edge.
No, don't do it.
Bunny?
Oh wait, that worked.
We're going down.
Bunny, that worked! We're free!
It's working buddy.
Okay, I think that's good.
Who the hell are you?
The fuck?
Strange symbol.
Broken doctor, broken doctor.
Doctor.
Dr. Strange.
Okay, let's go down this one.
Like...
Not right out of my finger heart.
This is not right out of my fucking finger heart.
No escape.
Yeah, we did get...
Oh, okay!
Oh, okay.
I think no part of this is not going out of my fucking face, no part of this game.
Yeah, we're gonna get- Oh, okay!
Okay.
I have to go the other way.
I have to go the other way.
Okay, let's try this again.
Again?
Yep, okay.
This way.
Okay.
Oopsie.
Whoa.
Okay, let's go this way, let me see you, okay, no pain in you.
Okay, didn't know that it was, uh, okay, so.
Oh, it showed me, it showed me the triangle, didn't it show me that, yeah, that one,
that one.
I realize that's what that was for.
Okay, I gotta pay attention.
Okay, that one.
I'm remembering.
I'm gonna remember that.
BITCH!
Are you serious?
Oh my god.
Okay, go, go, go!
Thank you, bunny!
I love this little guy.
Oh, Crouch.
I love him.
Wheeeeee!
Whoa!
Ah, he's big as shit now.
Oh, I'm little. Am I the bunny?
Bunny, help me!
Oh, shit.
Coming buddy, don't worry.
Easy, he's not gonna get me.
Okay, I'm dead, I'm dead.
Shit.
We did it!
The air smells beautiful.
Run little rabbit.
You're not the only one.
There will always be more.
I don't like that.
Oh my god.
Okay.
We completed the rabbit.
Now it's a whole nother act. Act 3, the cat.
Another fucking baby's here.
Girl I don't feel bad. I don't feel bad for you.
Kitty!
Um... Kitty? What's going on?
Oh, hello?
I did an order of pizza.
Yeah, my name is Tonka Jahari, but I would never order entire pizza for myself.
What is this kitty?
You know the picture of the cat crying in his paws out, and that's what I just felt like.
Hi Kitty. Kitty? Kitty? Kitty? Okay. Curiosity, quick as you can follow me through the portal.
Don't let him see. Got it. Got it. Got it. Have to follow Kitty through the portals
and do not let the baby see.
June 2nd, at lock 940.
Painting travel continues to be the best way to journey between worlds.
Painting travel?
I must be him from the childhood.
I risked the same fate as the others.
It's hard not to worry about being followed back though.
That's not to element.
Painting travel, okay. So that's what they're doing. They're using painting travel.
Okay, here I come, little guy.
Newt. The Newt is missing.
Or so tell me, packed it.
Frustration building.
Feeling.
Lonely.
Logan.
Okay.
Gonna have to figure out who Newt is.
The book goes here.
Wait, well that's a good observation.
Because I just found a book back here.
And then there's one more maybe.
Wait kitty, what was this over here?
Socket.
Okay.
Now what kitty?
Oh, it doesn't have to be like in a certain order.
Okay, hold on.
One, two, three, four, five, six, one, two.
What number was that?
Okay, that's not two.
Okay. Are there multiple books?
Are there other books about?
Oh, yeah, look at that.
Okay. Boom.
Okay. And then two, three, four.
What do we got here, was that five?
Okay, boom.
I'm a genius kitty.
Okay, that's doing much.
Okay, this is locked.
Take a piece of coal.
I'm not trying to explode it, like I'm not trying to do here.
Okay, nice.
That doesn't even do nothing.
Boom cracked it wide open hello hello kitty can't just do that
Oh, that's...
Hello?
Oh.
Kitty!
Okay, okay, hi.
Okay, trying to figure out why the baby is the way he is.
There's nothing to do with these weird little flowers.
Kitty, a robot.
I have to fix him, requires battery.
Okay, insert battery.
I saw one of those upstairs.
Yeah, yeah, I've seen one of those up there.
Oh no, there's one right here.
Wait, this one's broken though.
Wait, this is a new one.
Okay, nice.
Nice, nice, nice.
Hello?
Wake up.
Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
Wake up!
I have to repair him.
Oops, sorry.
I could fix him.
He's a little wonky.
I could fix him, though.
Oops, wrong room.
Alright, pass me- oops, sorry.
Pass me the screwdriver.
He doesn't want that.
Okay, the fuck?
Ink cartridge?
Uh...
March 1st, log 334.
Newt is proving to be one of my most valuable creations.
His hell-parvasting or dangerous specimens has been a particular moon.
Although I do need to address the naturally-designed floor,
poor sol just keeps collapsing.
Let's keep some spares on hand, is my right, you two?
Look at them.
Should I plug you in?
Whoa!
He is newt.
He is newt.
What's your-
He's loading.
Where's the Santa hat?
What the heck?
Yippee!
That was so bad.
Want to go?
Go!
Nooo!
Welcome!
Oh, hello.
Hug?
Oh.
Thanks?
Ooh.
I don't need an ink cartridge.
Thank you.
Welcome! Oh, hello!
Hug? Oh, thank you!
He's an ink cartridge. Okay, I'll be right back. I remember seeing something like that, uh...
Somewhere ink cartridge.
Okay, that looks like ink over here. That's embalds ink cartridge.
I remember seeing like that some oil. That's not, that's not ink. Oh it was down there.
Oh a dono. Let's see I have to scroll down.
Pape Sha Cool with the $50 dono. Okay so you won't let me see the kids but this kind
of baby sitter you just leave them with?
Hashtag justice for baby daddy.
Okay, first of all, since when was I the baby mother?
Since when was I his baby mother?
First of all, yes, the baby mama won't let him see the kids,
but that ain't got nothing to do with me.
So, Papa Shikul, you need to figure that out with the baby mother.
But thank you for the $50 don't know.
But thank you for the $50 don't know.
Baby mama, let me see the kids.
OK, hey, he's getting closer in the painting.
Hey.
That's good.
Keep the ring spinning.
Keep door sealed.
Wait, I gotta pee really not.
Let me pee really quick.
you
you
you
you
you
You
Y'all
Y'all need to get these. I know it's like I'm holding a piece of fucking dookie. Y'all need to get these.
If you like a little, if you like a little, um, a little sweet tree and you just want a little bite of something.
Oh, so she did shit. The little, what do they call the bonbons from Trader Joe's? Mmm, the frozen bonbons.
bonds they're so fudgy and delicious
no it's not it's not from the baby cyper that girl that's Brig Fadero
Brig Fadiero from Brazil. Yes! That is what it's called. I think it does say that on
the package too. Mmm. It's so good. It's so good when you eat a little. Mmm. It's a little something sweet.
Mmm.
Okay.
I don't know if I'm in a different outfit.
Hmm, kinda like the pirate, let's do pirate.
Yarr!
Alright Newt, I'm gonna find some ink for ya.
I didn't equip it.
Shit
Inc
No, what the hell was that?
Yeah, oh, thank you new
No!
Are you okay?
Attach a new booster.
Booster?
I hardly know her.
Hold on, Noop, I'm going here.
Okay, so I gotta put Noop on there.
But I think if I take Noop off of here, it's gonna close the door.
Yeah, okay, hold on, Noop.
I gotta figure something out first.
Oh, a booster.
I found one.
Can't be attached by hand.
Well, new, how am I supposed to do it?
Okay.
Do I put him on the thing?
I'm trying.
No!
Oh, okay.
I don't know.
He doesn't want the screwdriver.
Hammer?
Okay.
Okay, doesn't want that. Back in the room.
The other one.
And then Newt goes there. Okay, I'm understanding it.
So I just have to figure out how to get Newt in here without closing the door.
The door stop.
Locked.
Why is this like a holy door stop?
The fuck?
No!
Oh, I have to put it there.
I've got a door stop works, Newt.
Woooah, yes!
I need that done to me, that looks like it feels good.
YAY!
Noot!
Oh my god, are you serious?
Why, you wouldn't want that done?
This seems like a nice pick me up, no?
Just me?
Okay.
Oh no, fuck!
Come on, bro.
Oh.
Bro, you're stuck.
Yeah.
OK.
I know I have to find a freaking screwdriver.
You want a wrench?
How about a nut and bolt?
OK.
I got to go find a wrench.
Do we even have a wrench, Newt?
Oh, I found it, Newt.
Wait, I can't pick it up, Newt!
Uh, wait, no, that's a screwdriver.
What am I talking about?
That's not a wrench.
Dang it, Newt, I'm just a girl.
A wrench! I found it!
There you go, Newt.
Nice. Now what?
Oil. Can do that. I can do that.
Wait!
Is there enough in this one?
Perfect.
Oh! Bottoms up!
I love this guy.
Now what?
Hammer. Yep. I can do that right here.
And there you go.
The baby's getting a little closer now.
I think we need to hurry it up.
Oh, okay, he fixed it.
No, you're the effing goat.
Well, let's test it out.
Oh, hell, it's pirate outfit!
Oh, fuck no!
Shit!
He figured out how to time travel through the paintings.
That little fucking shit.
That little fucking shit.
Oh, that picture of him is-
Oh!
I saw that!
I saw that!
Oh, hey, Newt. Newt.
Did you see what just happened in that picture?
Urgh!
This is the laboratory.
Let's look around.
August 15th, log 6 after 10.30.
I won't quit the incredible idea to redecorate.
We're going to surround.
Why not make the place my home?
Right.
I have this burning desire to paint the walls yellow.
Oh.
Yellow.
So feminine, human, and really such a fun word to say.
Yellow.
Yellow.
Yellow.
Yellow.
This is the yellow room.
Yellow, yellow, yellow, yellow, look, I'm being assumed to be yellow.
Okay.
Whoa, look at there.
Look it in there.
Is that the outside? That's outside. I want to go to there.
Nutes, please let me outside.
I want to go outside.
This is nice.
Okay, so blue plus red equals supposed to be purple, but this looks a little pink, equals
evil baby.
Okay, new new waters the flower the flower makes the blue
There's a key up there
Okay, so we're gonna have to make oops new we're gonna have to make a a bottle
Okay
New come over here
Okay, gonna harvest that, put it in the cauldron, and then, uh, what's the other one?
The red one.
Nope, we need a red one.
a handle. Why would the red one be at? Red one. Oh, is this it?
Oh, I gotta put the ball in the tube.
I don't think so.
I'm gonna just put it here for now.
Okay.
I can't get it though.
It's too high.
Newt!
Can you get it for me, Newt?
I can't get it.
It's just out of reach.
Requires two regions to mix.
Oh, the red's already in the fucking bitch!
Oh my god.
Okay.
Beat it up!
Beat it up!
Beat it up!
Mix them up!
Nice.
Give me a bottle.
Whoa.
Give me that magical juice.
That magical juice, that baby juice.
Oh, come on, bro. Are you serious?
Wait, I think I'm safe.
Look and keep the ring spinning.
Remember, it said to keep the r- Hey!
Oh, I was just wondering when you were gonna get here.
We were all asking about you.
We were all- Oh, took a hammer with him.
Find okay, they uh wait. Does he yet? Does he have the key? Oh everything's stuck to him
What about the key? Oh
Okay, um
Okay, just come with me. I guess I don't know just I don't want I don't want to hear you crying
Okay, I'm gonna take this oops. Sorry
Okay, I'm already not happy that this is here. So I already feel like something bad's about to start happen
Do not drink
Okay, that, that was no arm, no foul.
You know, just a little fart juice.
It's not going to hurt anybody.
Little fart juice never hurt anybody.
Let's just go here.
Kitty, I see you.
I see you in there, Kitty.
Okay, so I have a foul.
So let's try this.
Oh careful kitty. Whoa! Oh I understand. I got a feed in this.
Dang it!
Okay.
Sit here.
Drink this.
Bro, go in the dang- there he go.
Okay.
Boom.
Grab the key.
Perfect.
There you go, okay
Boom grab the key
Perfect. Thank you, baby. All right
And what do I do with this now? Oh right here
Kitty kitty kitty, okay, where'd the kitty go? Where do you go?
Kitty, can you go through the door?
Noop, do you have to go onto this?
Oh, he doesn't want to go onto there.
Well, where the hell did the kitty go?
Behind you.
Kitty!
Oh, how the hell am I supposed to get-
The worst part isn't even the fear of being crushed, it's the worst part is that the bathroom
was in that half.
Lockend.
Oh.
Okay, find a way up.
Find a way up.
Up, up, up.
Hey!
When did he get up there?
Oh, bitch.
Um, there's a ladder behind me.
Oh my God!
There's a ladder behind me.
Oh my god!
Okay, I have to move it first, I think.
How the fuck am I supposed to move it?
with the baby. Okay. Can you go under here? I think if it's not what it is. There's a
switch on the floor. Oh, there was a donut. One second. Griffin with the $50 donut. Hey,
Deva got fired from my job the day you announced the V Day party.
Saw the day tickets were on sale and said, fuck it, coming all the way from North Dakota
and first time traveling since being diagnosed with panic disorder, went with my gut.
No regrets.
Love you.
Oh my God, you are going to have so much fun.
I'm so proud of you.
You're going to do amazing with the traveling.
You're going to kill it, and you're going to have so much fun, and it's going
to be a fun time.
And fuck it, hey, fuck it.
a little bit of fun while you're in between jobs right now. That's what life is about. Just
having a little bit of fun. Just having a little bit of fun every now and then. Thank
you so much. Griffin for the $50 Dono. YOLO, dare I say. And have fun at the party. Yes,
we're going to have so much fun. He newt showed me a picture. Okay, someone said there
something on the floor. What? What, Newt? Newt, I don't... the candle. Okay, what am I
not understanding, Newt? Okay, the switch is on. Oh, now I plug you in to that?
That's all I had to do was switch it on, Newt.
Boom.
Got it.
Okay, what if the candles have anything to do with that?
Oh, God.
Okay, now the candle's got to do with the code.
is that that's probably what he's trying to tell me now get out of here I'm sorry
okay okay well I can't okay I'm gonna just start turning I think eventually
I'll get it
because that's just the type of bitch I am because that's just the type of bitch I am
This one's missing, so I don't like that.
Fell off a ladder.
Ravaged by the mental.
What the hell?
Kitty.
Um, February 27th, lock 899.
Kitty.
The cat.
Well, she's a particularly curious creature.
Yes, the cat.
And whether she has motives or a master of sorts,
I simply do not know.
She peers intelligence and is quick to warn me of danger.
I want to sue her.
I must let C.F. face my way sharply from my dreams.
I really hope she stays.
Hmm.
I locked Newt out. Newt! No, he's chilling down there. No, he's busy working. He'll come
I'll come find me when he needs me.
Oh!
Can I take a picture?
Oh! Uh, sure, I'll take a picture of you, I guess.
I don't have any film in it. Hold on, I gotta get some film first.
Uh...
Hold on. I'll be right back.
There we go.
Okay.
Okay, ready?
Smile!
And one, two, three!
Let's see how that looks.
Okay, I'm going to go develop it.
Oopsie.
Okay.
Shake it around a little bit.
I'm just going to hang it up.
Where do I hang it up?
That is a good picture of you, dare I say.
Okay, sorry.
You like it?
That's a good picture.
Okay.
Um, now what?
Wait, it says insert film into the projector.
I did.
Take more photos.
Okay.
Uh, sure.
Wait, why is this one not- oh.
That one was not fun.
I'm gonna try this one, close the door.
Don't look at me like that.
Yeah, that one's kind of sad.
Okay, I'm gonna do another one
Now it's happy again weird
It's broken
Okay, let's try this one.
Okay now what am I supposed to do this a million fucking times?
There's gotta be something else I'm missing.
Should I take a picture of him?
Let me try this one.
Take a picture of the lever.
Okay.
Okay.
Oh, oh, because it's not broken, because it's not broken in there.
I'm understanding it now.
Baby stones in your photo.
Okay.
Boom.
I get it.
It looks dead, maybe there's some way to restore it.
Well of course there is!
Just gotta take a picture of it.
Oops.
Beautiful.
Hey.
Okay.
Hey.
Okay.
Wow.
Hey, newt.
Help me.
Help me!
Thank you, Newt.
Nice. Okay.
Through the next potion.
Okay, do I have to go back? Where do we do that at?
Oh, just right back through here.
Okay, nice.
All right.
Ooh, I just make and shit up now?
All right, let's do uh, oh
Green and red. Okay, let's do green
Red
Thanks, I'm making happy
Okay, look he's hungry ass he's already ready
Okay, you want to try this?
What the fuck?
God!
He's 9 million pounds!
Okay.
Okay, I gotta do that quickly though.
Holy shit.
Okay.
I can't even walk fast with him. He's that fucking heavy. Oh, I could put him on the thing? I gotta be quick though.
No, no, no!
Okay, but it will work with these nine million pounds. Okay, okay, I gotta go bring the bottle over here.
Okay.
I gotta bring the bottle over here.
Okay, hold on.
Wait, but if I put the bottle down, doesn't it drop it?
What if I gently place it?
Okay, fuck me.
Okay.
Huh.
Vacuum him?
Is there one that goes right there?
Okay, vacuum him through the tube.
I don't know which one, though.
The one in the hallway?
Oh, look, it's glowing.
Perfect!
Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, I get to go outside.
It's beautiful. It's beautiful, Newt.
It's beautiful.
Can I fall off the edge?
No.
Newt, it's so beautiful.
Hey!
Stop the baby!
Stop that!
Where'd he go?
Wait, should I shoot him?
Stopped him.
Right in his tracks.
Perfect, we stopped him.
What?!
How did I not stop him?!
Where is he?
Okay, now what?
No, what am I supposed to do with him when he's...
It just says stop the babes.
Oh noot that hit noot too. Oh that flew him off the map.
Put him in the cannon. I can't pick him up. It won't let me pick him up.
Where's that little bitch? There he is. Get over here. I can't pick him up.
Knock him out. Then put him in the cannon. Smart.
Oh shit, okay, he flew away that time, okay, I gotta check it.
Where is he?
Okay, get him.
Get him.
Did that work?
No!
Fuck!
Okay, we got him this time.
Okay, we got him this time.
Oh, he's over there.
Okay.
Knock him out.
Put him in the cannon.
Shoot him off.
Perfect!
Perfect!
Okay.
Oh my god.
Thank you, Newt.
Fucking finally.
Okay.
Got to go.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Dude, this game is long. I didn't realize how long this game was.
Oh, he's pissed. Okay, rightfully so. Rightfully so.
for anyone who's played this game how much longer do you think like how much
longer is there in the game there's still a good bit like am i over half you
You think? I'm just curious. So like, I'm over half. Probably like 30% more. 15% more. What happened?
40 minutes maybe an hour. Okay, hold on one second actually. I have to text somebody back.
He's drawing pictures of himself sad.
Discover the final patient.
Oh my God!
Give him alone!
Okay, hold on, I'm going to make it.
Pink plus, I don't know, pink plus what?
Pink plus everything.
Pink plus.
Wait, no.
Okay, so you could only do two.
Okay, never mind.
Doctor Thickness with the Five.
Thank you, Doctor Thickness with the Five.
Okay, let's try this
Oh, hello
His ass is not for count
But you know his hungry ass walk as soon as I fill this up. Oh wait. Oh
It doesn't make him small. What is this? Oh
Tiny
Okay
Okay, that's not the recipe
Let's try
Pink and blue
Yellow it's gotta be this one cuz he's the baby with the yellow shirt. I'm sure it's this one. Oh
Look he was excited to drink this one
Okay, I don't yeah
Okay. Stabilize it. Find a way upstairs. Okay. I'll be right back, maybe.
Um, take his power.
New, he's scared, new!
New, it's okay.
I don't know how to comfort him though, but new, I need your help though!
To get upstairs.
Uh...
Maybe I should feed him a nicer potion first?
The emergency binky? I don't think it's emergency time yet though. It's there, it's not...
New... Okay, hold on, new.
Okay, I'm gonna give him... I'm gonna give him this one.
Give him the one that makes him small.
Okay, now he's just small and evil, okay, fire, he's a scare to the fire, I know new.
What the hell are we gonna do, bro?
What's it do with this motherfucker, bro?
I got to get up there though I got to get upstairs fire yeah I know there I know
Oh, should I cook him?
OK.
That didn't really help.
Is the elevator working?
It's locked.
Fuck!
What the hell are we supposed to do?
Wait, is he telling me to get fire?
Make another yellow potion, put him by the vines.
The baby fire, mm, okay.
He was holding the fire up next to the- okay, that makes sense.
Okay, look out, dude.
Nice.
Okay.
Perfect.
We did it.
Look out, dude.
Nice.
Okay.
Perfect.
We did it.
Eww.
This is kind of like your room, I used to look.
I'm trying to play basketball, okay fine, I won't touch your toy box again, I won't touch
your toy box again.
Man fuck, man fuck you, you know what, you know what, I've had it with you, I've had
with you I'm out of here move
here not his ass okay we're good are we
Stabilized, no
Align the rings, okay, well girl they're spinning like fast as fuck
Keep the ring spinning keep the ring spinning. Okay. Wait is one is that moving one hold on
Maybe there's like a certain order to it
Okay, I think it goes to this one.
This one.
This one.
Okay.
Oh, wait, wait, the rings are not supposed to stop spinning.
Yeah, we're cooked.
Retrieve the core. Okay, we'll do that now.
Is there anything that I need up here?
Okay.
New, come on, new, uh, newer, newer, newer, newer self, uh, brace the door, with what?
There is no, this is no time for photography.
Okay, hold on.
Okay, I didn't realize it said to brace the door.
Okay.
Okay, I got this.
What?
Brace the door.
New, hurry.
Is that braced enough?
That's gotta be braced enough, right?
That's probably not braced enough.
I don't think that's braced enough.
Oh, it was.
Oh, up?
Get a boost up. Thank you, Newt.
Whew.
Okay.
Okay, Newt. Careful.
This is probably still here.
No, it's okay. Okay, we have to retrieve the core and then head outside.
Okay, let's just be calm.
Oh, my god.
I'm gonna have to get out of here for a while.
Okay, let's just be calm.
We just gotta get the core.
Not safe to pick up search the garden for the missing pieces
That's a cannonball
There's all the cannonballs that I threw it
Look around a little bit
There's more in there
Oh, there's one piece.
Come on!
Okay, return.
Oh, shit!
Give it to Noose!
Here, Noose!
Go!
Noose, go!
Go no go
Go no go go
No, oh
oh shit wait okay wait that I think I had to keep up okay I was waiting for noob
please want to just stare at it okay muscle left muscle right no okay we're
Okay.
Nope.
No.
No, do you want to take a nap?
Okay, uh, okay, I'll do a nuke, don't worry.
How do I, Nuke, how do I put it in there?
the fuck is that? Alright, let's go to the edge. This thing is heavy. Don't touch him.
Come on, come on!
Ouch!
OUCH!
No.
No.
Ah!
Are you serious?
No, no, I can fix him, I can fix him, I can fix him, please, I can fix him, I can fix
him.
Don't say that!
What's happening?
What's happening?
Hello?
Oh!
Nude, I'm sorry!
Drop Nude down into the lab following his death.
Okay, I didn't mean to do...
I've got an achievement for that, though.
Can I get an RIP mute in the chat?
Okay, I hope that guy likes a second life, I'll be playing on fucking page now.
It's a fire outfit, don't stay fucking with me.
Wait, get him!
There's multiple of them?
Why did you bring him here?
I DIDN'T!
Not this time.
Oh, thank you.
The doctor.
Thanks, Doc.
Ooh, service to the crown.
Okay.
Okay, hold on one second.
I don't know what he said.
This is Crown Child Care.
You're joking.
You have won the message.
Hello and congratulations.
Your application has been successful,
And we're very pleased to welcome you to the Crown Childcare Family.
Report to reception for orientation.
Reception?
The journey with us starts today.
Oh, I'm at the place.
At the place that keeps sending all these fucking people.
Finally!
I get to speak to the people in charge.
Because why the hell do we keep-
Good morning and welcome to your first day at Crown Childcare.
Let's get started.
go on to the computer to print your contract we encourage you to read each
section carefully before signing okay we'll do but should I clock in first like
I mean okay just have me doing work for free but whatever I guess
okay um okay
Nobody's a-
Okay, um, oh, okay, we got the coins, so I couldn't get a snack if I would like.
So no one told me the code or nothing, okay I'm gonna get um, I'm gonna get something
from the, from the vending machine.
Um, let me do a, okay the C button is broken.
You seem very busy doing something well you tried the note on the side of the
computer oh I didn't actually let me get a bag of chips first though no on the
side of the computer
girl I gotta go around to look at this
1895
Can you mail?
It's your first day.
Print contract?
Okay.
Perfect.
Um, okay.
Let me just sign this.
Okay, this mysterious looking pen.
Welcome to the Family Employee 225.
Yep, that's me.
Place your contract in the care hatch and collect your employee card.
Perfect.
Woo!
Now I get to clock in!
Hey!
It's him. Feed him, play with him, keep him, smiling, your performance will be monitored.
Okay, I'm going to do my best work.
Your primary role at Crown Childcare is his happiness and well-being. You can start with some light entertainment.
Toys have been provided.
Okay, perfect.
Whoa, whoa, that's fun, huh? Look at look it ready
Okay, what about another train out another train a zoom look at this look at this look
What about this you like this yeah, you like that one
That's fine, right?
Maybe we um some trampoline time whoa
Entertainment have its place, but his throat is essentially that time taken upstairs to be fed then back downstairs to change him
Okay upstairs to be fed back downstairs
There's that noise of the damn car. Oh, sorry
Okay upstairs
What the fuck is this?
Input sequence correctly. I'm supposed to put the baby in there
Okay, okay, I won't worry about that in a little bit.
Okay, how the fuck do I go upstairs?
Can I go up the slide?
What the hell's the stairs?
Oh.
Naughty corner.
Ooh, I might have to put you in there if you're not being good.
Okay. Oopsies. Okay. Okay, change the baby. Where is the diaper world? That's, no, where
is the diaper station? What the hell am I supposed to change your stank-ass fucking
2D diaper. Is that back downstairs?
Oh. Woohoo!
That was fun, right?
Oh.
Oopsy.
Yeah, well of course. This is definitely normal.
Okay, so I have to... Okay, uh...
Ah!
Yeah, no for sure
Oh, he's ready for bed.
He's not quite ready yet.
What?
Take him upstairs and tuck him into bed.
Oh, okay.
He's already knocked the fuck out.
He's already knocked the fuck out.
Good night, little guy.
An adequate first shift is going to keep you alive.
You've earned yourself a crown sticker.
Thank you. I want to go and check out.
Perfect!
Okay, oh and then put it in the rack, okay
Thank you
Add sticker to a branch of the progress chart. Where's the progress chart? Oh?
Put it right there. Oh, okay
Go home. Your continued work helps us grow. Thank you
Welcome to ground child care. You're doing good every day. Okay, I
Feel like I barely got any sleep
It's okay.
Baby!
Good morning, Employee 225.
You'll find him in the naughty corner following a little incident last night.
Let's ease him into the day with some quiet story time.
Okay, uh, hello, hello?
What happened? Oh, it's okay.
It's okay.
I'm not gonna hurt you.
Okay, I'm gonna read you a book. Let's read about the mom- let's read about...
Do I get to pick?
Okay, he's being a little bad.
You know, maybe he's misunderstood.
Okay, now he's looking a little pissed off.
Okay.
Okay, I think he's gonna get I think he's gonna get really mad at me
Get over here
All right fine, you know what you win
Okay, let me help him.
Uh, okay, sure.
Um, hey!
Get over here!
Who taught him how to drive?
Get over here now!
Over here! Look at him drifting! He's fucking nuts!
Okay. Okay.
What is this? A vacuum? Yeah, give me that.
Can I use that?
What can I use it? Oh my God, of course!
He bullshit.
Oh, I actually- Oh, okay, okay. What if I force him out here?
here. Make it slip on. Oh, fucking bitch. Get over here.
Okay, we'll do so they want him are you bad
Okay, what's next?
Let's stop this stuff.
Hmm, okay.
Discratch the baby.
He's ready?
Quickly, take him to reception for processing.
Okay.
Dispatch him. Order labels.
Okay, I'll just stay right there.
What was it again? 1897.
18, what was it?
95.
Thank you, Lime.
Okay.
Okay, the child's past valuation is ready for placement with loving new parents.
Please ensure he is properly labeled.
Casilda Blackwood, apartment 10.
Oh my God.
So it wasn't even her born baby.
So she adopted him.
So it's this company.
It's this company.
That is BS.
Another child sent out into the world a truly remarkable...
another so soon.
What? Are you s- Wait, what?
Quickly, clean up that mess you made in the playroom.
The arrival. It must be perfect.
Oh, oh my god. There's someone else already?
Dude, this place is a fucking disaster.
Okay. Um...
Is there already another one?
Do they all look the same?
Do I have to empty it? Okay, empty the vacuum cleaner.
Report to the catch. Okay. It's time.
It's time?
A record.
What is the record?
Where? Where is there even a record player?
Where was that record player?
Welcome to the new arrival stand in awe.
Everyone's scaring it off.
Oh!
It's beautiful.
Open the seed.
So they all are the same.
All the new arrival is safely tucked into bed before you clock out.
So there's multiple of them.
Okay, I understand it now.
Another sticker has been earned.
Thank you.
It's even deserved.
Thank you.
I got my sticker!
Yay!
Okay, it's gonna go home now. Oh, answer the phone.
Crown child care, how can I help you?
Hi, it's Edward Stern.
Hi, Edward.
Would you be able to send another, sir, the one you sent in last very long?
Yeah.
Thank you, bye.
Yeah, no problem. We'll do that really quickly.
Okay, we see Edward Stern.
Let's send, okay, Oliver, stupid, so very stupid,
not afraid of a challenge, approaches work with a can-do attitude,
and Julian, calm, soft, spoken.
I'm gonna send Oliver.
Perfect, okay, uh, alright, let me go home now.
Alright, goodnight everyone, see you tomorrow.
Our continued work helps us grow.
We'll see you again tomorrow.
Yes, you will.
All right.
Here I go.
Welcome to Ground Shop here.
Nurturing growth every day.
Oh, he's ready for me.
Hi!
Oh, wow, that's impressive.
Good morning, Employee 225.
Today we'll be focusing on blocks and building.
A simple yet meaningful activity.
Even the smallest sapling holds the potential to become a towering tree.
But a sapling cannot plant itself.
It must be careful, nurtured, sustained.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Pick him up. Build with him. Grow.
It feels like your first shift was only yesterday.
I feel like that. Here we are. Your two-week anniversary.
Oh! Please enjoy the festive provisions.
Can you see the tree?
Can I see the tree?
Fuck you, Charm, I'll pick up the card. Congratulations. Okay, that's all it says.
That's fun. Uh, I should sit down first, okay. Oh, an apple! Okay. Well, I want to play Pin
the Foot on the Rabbit. Where's the foot? Oh, okay. I-I'mma close my eyes! I did it!
Is there another one?
Woohoo!
Okay, let me email.
Oh
Good morning, 225, today's activity is painting, everyone gather round and watch as 225 demonstrates
their incredible artistic skill.
You
Dan should do this first.
Okay, just hold up.
Make it a really tall flower.
I worked so fucking hard on that!
Oh
Big
Okay, I know we could have two at one time I didn't know that was allowed
Twins? Careful, you're gonna have to back up off of that.
Move, okay. Alright, fine. You wait for your brother then.
I don't even know who's home.
Uh, well, couldn't even tell him apart if I wanted to, so, um, okay, let me go get
you guys a bottle so you can go do that really quickly. You guys stay there.
Oh, thank you. There you go.
Okay, relax.
Fussy eater.
Interesting.
Take him to the staff room.
Let's try a more appetizing option.
Ooh, you about to get in trouble.
You about to get in trouble.
Come here.
Oh, uh, oh, oh, shit, some milk, perhaps?
Some baby food?
Food must be warmed up.
Oh, my God, this motherfucker is so picky.
Talk about no favor.
It's look at all, look at all I'm doing for this motherfucker.
Crowd chat here reminds you, do not consume baby food, no matter how tempting it may
be.
I
Okay
Well, you were told do not eat the baby I didn't
Shove it all in your greedy little bag. I didn't get back in the kitchen and do your job
My god, why did I do that? Wait? Why am I in the naughty room?
Who do you want son? Oh wait, I'm still eating it
Hey get move this little bitch she won't let me out okay. I don't I'm not trying to eat
it I'm trying to give it to him. Is the other one still in here? Oh he's pissed off. Okay
This one's a little shit.
OK, OK, I'm still eating the damn thing.
Come on, put it down.
Stop his tantrum.
This little motherfucker could be forced open.
OK, good to know.
This thing now drive on its own?
Okay, do I need a wrench or something?
I need a...
Something.
A screwdriver or something.
Oh, maybe screwdriver.
Okay, maybe a plunger.
Okay, come on!
The hell?
Where are the other babies gone?
Crowbar? Where?
Oh.
Heavy is the head that holds the crown.
Oh, he thinks he- he thinks he the fucking- who are you feeling like?
He thinks he's the fucking king.
I thought it said clock it clock it clock it clock it clock it clock I can't see the
tree I can't see the tree I can't see the tree I'm not worthy this seems to be like
all the thoughts in my own head, okay, star, checkmate.
It was, I was not meant to rule true king, I was not, this is his kingdom, glory to the king, I am his.
Long live the king, long live the king.
King amongst men, men amongst the king.
Okay, so this baby's the fucking king?
Is that what you're trying to tell me?
I am meant to rule, I bear the crown.
It's just, I am worthy.
Wait, so then I am worthy?
Oh!
Okay, wait, we were just starting to get like, positive.
I'm sorry I didn't know that he had a fucking life in here
So why would they tell me to wake him up?
Like, why would they even?
That's the throne. That's what they meant by the throne.
Okay, I'm understanding it now.
I feel like I'm gonna see the tree now.
Are you, are you coming to the trees?
Okay, end your shift clock out.
Okay, we'll fucking do it.
You're not gonna tell me fucking twice.
Oh, I think it has a little freak ass up there.
Where's he? Where's your brother?
All right.
Okay, look out.
Oh, did you not get a sticker?
Strange. That only happens to incompetent employees.
Okay.
Sleeping on the job means unpaid overtime.
Deliver the package.
Okay, the Toasty.
Oh my god, am I going to deliver it to apartment 10?
Where is this getting delivered?
Remember?
I should ring the bell.
Welcome to Ground Shadcare, nurturing growth every day.
Okay, it's a new day. Let's just put everything behind us.
What's gonna happen the other day?
Oh, we got some upgrades in here.
Fun Fair Day, entertain the babies, guys!
Oh, how many of you are here now?
Good morning, 225. We've had a new arrival.
It's a perfect day for a fun fair.
Okay, well, maybe you could play seesaw.
Oh, careful!
Woohoo!
Um, okay.
I feel like he's gonna get really pissed.
Okay, sorry!
Oh, gosh.
You're that entiling, necessary.
Okay, I'll-
Get it down so we can continue with the festivities.
Okay, I will do that.
I'll get it down.
Uh, okay.
If I were to get it down, how would I do that?
Okay.
Okay.
I'll get it down.
Uh, okay.
If I were to get it down, how would I do that?
If I were to get it down, how would I do that?
Let me go up here.
Shit, okay.
What the fuck happened up here?
Oh, the cell?
I need some of that.
Need a stick?
Get a rope?
Come on!
Nothing? Piece of coal?
Wanna get changed in the time on this?
Oh no, let's just do it.
Perfect, okay.
Alright, so babies, we are fucked.
I don't know how I'm supposed to get that down.
Shit.
I don't know how I'm supposed to get that down.
Let me make a snowman while I'm here.
Do you want to build a snowman?
Beautiful.
Um, put a little hat on.
Oh, dang it, that was supposed to be his arm.
Okay, I'll sneak it up.
I'll sneak it up multiple arms.
He's beautiful.
Okay.
Alright, let's whip him.
Alright, babies.
I'm still trying to figure it out.
Okay, great.
Oh, Mr. Ike. Okay, you wanna make some ice cream? Okay, here you go.
Okay, everyone gets some ice cream. Okay, now what?
Okay, I still gotta get the toy plane down. So that's still on my agenda.
Um, one per child. It says one per child, guys.
Throw the baby? You can't throw the baby. Wait, I can actually. They won't be able to pick him up.
Ooh.
Okay, and pick him up.
I'm not going to miss.
That's a sign.
I'm going to get some exercise, change the door if that's its neighbors.
I don't know, I can't use the C-Saw cause I can't...
Okay, what would happen if I gave these more than one ice cream?
Ice cream privileges have been revoked one per child. Sorry. The sign could not have-
Oh, but look at that! But perfect!
Fun fair day is cancelled. That plane will company properly. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Let it go. Take that overfed child to the changing room now.
Oh girl, shut up.
Who the hell are these guys?
He's done.
No heather taking 225.
Destroy every last one of these spies.
Will do.
Okay, so destroy by destroy.
What do you mean, like okay.
Hey!
Look at him, he's taking fucking pictures.
Hey!
I can't get him.
I can't get him.
I can't get him.
I can't get him.
A hammer?
Locked.
We got that one.
I'm gonna get this.
Where's the other one? Up there.
Where'd he go? I know I saw him.
Uh-huh.
Get over here!
I see him, I see him, move baby!
I see him, he's taking pictures.
Get out of here!
Get out of here!
So this guy seems to be good, this guy in hindsight is good.
um the witch doctor guy where's the other one
where is he ah
outstanding work thank you anyone
Oh my god. How are we supposed to take one of them, Bailey?
Okay.
That sea is broken! How the fuck am I supposed to get him out?
How am I supposed to get him out?
D3?
I like that noise, nice.
Very impressive.
225.
Perhaps we misjudged you.
Why is this so sad?
Still, a brief evaluation is required.
Log on to the computer.
Okay.
Log on to the computer.
Okay.
Mandatory self-reflection due to recent activities, a brief assessment of your state of mind has been requested.
Your results will help us better understand your mood, temper, man and outlook.
Okay, sounds good.
What emotion stirs?
Honestly?
I'm intrigued.
What does it demand?
It demands compliance.
That's what they want me to say.
That's what they want me to say.
Where does this settle?
My soul.
What does this reveal?
I disobeyed.
I am a confused black cat.
Okay.
Redacted?
Signed a report.
Okay, let's-
WOOOOO!
The fuck is that?
Why was she wearing a banana suit?
Okay.
Hello?
Banana Grandma?
Yeah, you'll f- yeah.
Okay, tell me.
All three into bed, okay.
One.
two three. They're kind of sweet though when they're sleeping.
Knock it out. Oh, thank you.
If only you could see the tree one day I'll be able to see the tree I don't even know
what the fuck the tree is safe sleep practices love to see it oh a shiny
sticker oh dang it I missed it fuck
perfectly on there
Please take a seat. A member of staff will be with you shortly.
Okay, I guess.
I'm so tired.
I have seen the tree! It has taken root in me! Oh my god, I saw the tree.
Is this the tree am I the baby
Girl yeah it seems like it's been too long I ate all the dang snacks shy baby with the
The five-gifter, thank you, shy day with the five.
Listen, I just got home and your sitter has walked out.
They were supposed to feed him.
He needs a room.
I remember you.
I want to get you out of bed.
I'll use the sitter now.
Send someone right away.
I remember you.
Sure let's just yeah perfect that works amazing okay let me clock it then we
don't even know what day it is. Great. Endless care. Find the babies.
Two to five remains blind. Forget him.
What?
The rules have fallen in place.
Oh, man. He's been eating.
He's been eaten. Oh my god. He's been eaten. Oh my god
You're stinking us, baby
Okay, you're good
Where's the rest of them? Where's everybody else?
Oh, someone was being bad.
Okay.
What the fuck are you laying like that for?
Okay.
And then where is your brother?
Let's see.
Hey.
What was your problem?
Hey!
Fuckin' your problem.
Don't give me that look, I'm the only one here taking care of you, okay?
Don't be pissed at me.
That's how you ate them, will do.
You first.
Anything's good so far.
Yeah, he's not ready yet.
Oh.
Um, okay.
Oh, I think he is ready.
Hello?
Okay, sure.
Oh, banana-bunny-bunny-bunny-bunny-bunny-bunny-bunny.
Hello?
Are you, are you coming to the tree?
I gotta walk closer to it.
to show it.
Good morning, 225.
Hello.
Woohoo.
Ewww!
Man, this was literally me after I got up off my colonoscopy.
This was just how I was feeling.
Ewww!
Oh, shit. Oh fuck. This is a little house feeling.
Why?
Shit, let me clock in. Hold on.
Oh, that's not... What about this one?
What about that one?
Alright, what about this one?
Okay, uh, what about that one?
What about that one?
I'm trying oh my god this one probably cuz it's all it's too
You can't do anything right.
What the hell, they blew this bitch up!
Awww, who's the tiniest little thing?
Oh, another one?
Oh, water.
Okay.
Yay! More? Okay. Okay, sure. Take some more. Yep.
Okay, oh, bye!
So now what?
Okay, big ass camera.
Uh, feed him?
Oh, me?
Oh, okay.
So that was okay. So can I, so can I clock out now or what? Oh, I gotta go towards him again. Okay, I gotta go towards the light again.
Literally, I thought this was like a silly baby. I knew it would be a little spooky, but I thought this was like mostly silly.
This is like a whole story. I like it though. It's good.
Good.
Congratulations.
I'm going to do the same thing, because watch
how I'm about to eat this, though.
I'mma get it though.
Any day now.
I'm just like that. I'm just like that.
Now I gotta put on the mask.
First try too. Yeah, I got it on the first try.
I am banana grandma.
Holy fucking shit.
Oh my god, again?
Are you getting hazard pay for this?
Life, literally.
I've seen the train!
Finally!
This is- Okay, y'all were hyping this tree up, this shit is like a stump.
Man, fuck you!
Dispatch the baby, label the baby. Okay, I gotta dispatch him.
Okay, so I finally saw the tree, so I don't even know what that means for me.
Where are you going?
Oh, doesn't even say where that is.
What do you mean?
What do you mean, dispatch?
Good.
Check your email. Okay.
Okay, great.
Your dispatch attempt has failed
due to a facility lockdown.
Sending each child into the World Health
will screw up. Contact your supervisor
security measures. Great. Okay, so how the fuck do I do that?
That's some of their quests. Oh, great.
Okay, so what just happened? Ooh, a new room unlocked though.
Dang, where are these stickers I got?
Well, are people working back here too?
Correction, reflection, connection, protection, correction, correction, correction, correction,
Oathbreaker, Crown Bearer, Eilis, Thorned, Cradled, and Maskless.
Huh.
Only up here at dawn, this one calls to me a gentle bird song, the most consistent readings.
Okay.
Okay, I've got to answer some questions.
What is your first name?
Okay.
Let me get right back to you on that one.
Okay, let me round a little bit more.
Two Ambrose, okay, so I'm Ambrose.
Tether Cantor Harbinger Abyss, Dreamwalker Unspoken.
Okay, I'm Ambrose.
That's me, I guess.
Oh, I'm Banana Grandma.
Ambrose.
Yadora.
Isadora Nicholas.
Okay, and there's a note here.
What are those, Kams?
Hey, it's me, employee 225, fell asleep in the bathroom, okay.
Defended facility from spy dolls, I didn't do that.
Became agitated during lockdown and ate a large amount of baby food.
Okay. Can you blame me though?
Okay, strong problem solving out of the box, thinking unusual fascination with toys has potential
but fails to reach it, remains blind.
My name is Ambrose.
What is the focus of your research?
Dreams.
Ambrose.
Machines.
Emotions.
What is your what is your star sign? I am
maskless fuck I am the dream walker okay
The Oathbreaker!
Who seeks to stop us?
Well of course, it's Nicholas.
Can you see the tree?
Yes.
Yes!
I'm so good, okay.
Child dispatch failed.
And the lockdown! Oh my god!
Holy f-
Oh, okay, um...
Let me just go back in there, I guess.
Uh...
Actually, I'm just gonna go this way.
Is that okay with you?
That's actually the way that I go to get back, okay.
Can I go?
What?
I can't go?
Oh my God, bro.
Like, just set me down there.
We're on a carousel.
Set me down there.
Take me through there.
Take me through there.
Like...
I'm going to get back.
I'm going to get back.
I'm going to get back.
I'm going to get back.
I'm going to get back.
Take me through there, take me through there, like...
Whoa!
The tree!
Your eyes are open to the sun.
Yes! I've seen the tree!
Here I come. Any minute now.
Oh, she's a baddie. Who is this?
Hello!
Is this for me? Join them. I guess I don't have a choice.
choice. At last, 225 has awakened and joined us on the yellow path.
Yay!
My devoted, the King turns his gaze upon you.
That's not Kenny was born.
From his tree came his children, and we nurtured their growth.
We've spared their hunger. Now, its roots, strengthened by their feast, bring him to our world.
Rejoice! Dr. Arkham, the last remaining seeker, is crushed. The cat gained his trust and led a child to his refuge.
Now the world's war has been caused, don't worry. The doctor is alone.
A drift in ruin.
Dang it, Zora, this is the damage.
Nothing will stand against us. Nothing will deny his growth.
Nothing will silence his children.
Wow.
Soon the king arrives!
Huh.
Ah.
Okay, wait, so it's not that we still aren't done.
Oh, yes!
Oh, yes!
Wait, it's not over, it's not over!
I want to go with him.
And Newt.
I'm so sorry, yeah.
We'll fix this.
Yes, we will fix it.
It was the cat.
It must have been.
She was the only...
Only to get.
I feel young now.
I'm very young.
Come on.
We can stop her.
We can stop her.
We can stop her.
Don't worry.
We're gonna end this.
Oh cuz I'm a different person in this realm. Okay, I'm a different babysitter in this doctor world. Okay, I get it
I get it
The baby in yellow will return for a final act of madness
It's not over. Oh my goodness. They have to make a new war more to the game. My god, this was good
This was freaking good
Okay
Okay well I'm kind of wanting to do chapter select. No thank you.
Okay that was good.
Wait so their Christmas chapter. I don't want to do that.
Sorry I played that damn baby game. So are there different endings for for that part?
Like even though the game isn't done are there different endings?
For just that part or no? There's four endings?
The baby in yellow endings.
No, I think it's just, oh, all six endings.
Oh, okay, let's see.
Chapter one ending.
Wait, we already know this.
Wait, he got glasses on his baby?
No, we know this.
Okay, so it's the same, it's the same. It's just the ending of each chapter. Okay, okay,
got it, got it, got it. Dang! So the doctor used to be a banana grandma. Oh my god, I
don't know. But I like to do, it's fun. I guess we have to find out. I guess we've
to find out also I'm supposed to well not supposed to but the party I could go
to right now but I'm also not even dressed or ready for any of that I do I
I would like to go have a little fun.
I would like to go have a little fun.
Was that a permanent retainer?
Where?
No.
I heard those suck.
Merch is restocking the 12th.
Well, it's Valentine's Day merch.
This is one of the shirts.
But it's Valentine's Day merch on the 12th, and then the normal stuff is gonna be restocking at some point in March
I have them they don't suck really people that I know how to say they get irritating
The fuck
the hell I just clicked something on accident on my do-b-s I don't know what the fuck that
was
help me I don't know what that was
um wait actually
hold on
Hold on.
Okay, that, wait, hold on, wait, I'm going to try something really quickly.
I have to find the last dono and click the replay button to see if it works.
I'm scrolling, I'm scrolling, I'm scrolling, trying to find a don't know.
Okay, no, it didn't work.
I thought I would read it out loud.
I thought I would read it.
Wait, also, did I read that dono?
Where did it go now?
Is that one that I saw?
Yes, I did see that one.
Dang it!
So I don't know why I won't do that.
So I don't know why I won't talk it out loud.
It used to, it used to.
Why did it ever change?
Because I went live on my laptop.
This, on my streamlabs on my laptop.
And then when I came back on my OBS,
like fucked it up I was the weirdest thing and it like it's it like I don't
even know so yeah and and I keep forgetting to ask Niko but I'll have
him do it I could probably have him do it like over he probably just like logging
on my computer he doesn't even have to be here to do it
Um, no, I'm not, I don't know why it just fucked it all up.
So yeah, um, merch, it's vanilla mace.com, it'll be available on v12 at noon BST.
How was last night's dancing?
It was fun.
I went for like 30, 40 minutes, just like I said I would.
Just like I said, I would, I went, I saw my friend DJ, I danced around a little bit,
I bought some merch.
Oh my god, you want to see them guys? Okay. Tell me how to say it one more time. Is it yaoi?
Yaoi
Yeah
Remember the one that I thought was yaoi
It's yaoi. Okay, so the event was is called yaoi rave. Okay
And they had this merch and I was like
I put it over here because I wanted to show you and I forgot
It's yaoi
Yaoi? Okay, everyone's... No, it's Yaoi! Right? Anyway, look at this merch. I haven't even opened it. I have to see if it fits.
The Yawi Navy. The toxic Yawi Navy. Wait, and I got the hoodie too of course.
It's so good and I got the honey to go for it.
Yes.
The Yahweh Navy.
It's so good.
I love it.
I love it.
I love it.
But yeah, this one's left.
Where are your children?
Um, I don't know, actually.
There's a cat container at Ikea that looks like Miso.
Cat container.
Ikea.
Oh, my God.
Look at this guy.
Are you serious?
That is so cute.
And there's an orange one too.
That's cute.
Anyone else has a tuxedo?
That's perfect.
That's really cute.
It's only $8.
Only $8.
Only $8.
Go on back to Hananulu just to get that.
That Maui, Maui, that Maui, Maui, um.
But yeah, okay, let me text you.
Have you previewed what will be on sale on Thursday?
Just this and hello, this and a tank top I've showed you guys, but there's a few other things
too.
And then also the booty shorts are making a comeback, the booty shorts from last Valentine's
Day because people have been asking for that.
Fit for butchery, I still don't know, I still don't know, I still do not know.
But I see the new Jeff plushies.
Jeff, what is it like?
Marvel?
Wait, Land Shark, Jeff Land Shark Keychain?
These ones?
What the fuck?
This shit?
This one?
Ha!
Ha!
Ha!
That one?
That's his tongue out like that.
He is so silly.
Yeah, I want that. I want one of those.
I want one of those.
But I only want one of the top three or the dolphin one.
But that one's the secret.
The dolphin one is the secret.
Kind of want one.
Where are they going to sell them at?
Interesting.
Are the shorts permanent merch? They are. The shorts are permanent merch. They are.
But y'all, I've been trying to get fucking blind boxes made for so fucking long and it's been like a whole production.
I literally got, I got, um, uh, art in like, basically, I commissioned an artist to like,
design blind boxes for me like, literally a year ago, like, dead ass a year ago, and I still have
like, it's so, it's a whole thing. It's a whole thing. They are really cute. They're so cute.
And I'm like, fucking, woo! And it's just a matter of like, getting a company to want to do it
because all these companies are like, yeah, we can make you like, 20,000 of them,
But we can't make any less than that. I'm like, oh, I'm like, yeah, no. So I'm like, baby
I'm not labubu like I'm not labubu. So I
Don't know like I don't know if that's gonna work. But so yeah
I'm like, I don't I
Don't know but we're still trying to figure it out. So try to figure it out, but they're really cute
but no, they're they were like little like figurine ones like
Like the same material they'd be like the same materials a sunny angel like a standing they weren't like
Keychain ones. But they're really cute. Dude, and I want to get them made so bad.
You could definitely sell 20k. I don't know. Maybe I'm crazy.
I think that it's a big number. It's a big number. It's a big number.
I don't know. I'm scared. But I don't know. We'll see.
So oopsies. My agents are still trying to figure out.
been like going back and forth with a few companies on it, but I think we can maybe do it!
Did you get Adam and Eve to sponsor the party? No, but I am going to have some cool stuff
and some freebies and things at the party for people that are attending. So yeah. So
So don't worry. Don't worry. Don't worry. Don't worry. Can I get a free dildo? Hey, you never know what's going to happen.
Just throwing dildos into the ground. That would be a little bit questionable. I don't know if the venue would be too happy with me doing that.
Um, but, but yeah, so, um, I am still trying to get the blind boxes made, but we'll see.
We'll see.
I did play Lost Records a while ago.
We played it for like a good hour or two and it was just, I was like, okay, like, I don't
know.
It was like a little too slow for me.
So we just never played it again.
But I did like the graphics and I like the idea of it.
Yeah, that might actually hurt dildo to the head.
Like, I don't know if I could be throwing that into the crowd.
So I don't know.
But, um, but, um, I, for the party.
OK, one thing I will tell you about the party because I don't,
I don't, I'm not going to give away the tea of the party.
Like, obviously I'm going to have to like keep my secrets.
But I am, which I did at the last, I did at the Halloween party.
I threw Halloween sunnies into the crowd, but I'm going to be throwing the Valentine's Day sunnies into the crowd as well.
So I don't know if I told, I think I might have told you guys that already.
But anyway, so that's one thing I've been doing, but it's going to be fine, it's going to be fine.
So those are, those are a little, those are less, those probably won't hurt.
But if you get a secret, you have to give it to me.
Getting, getting, getting.
Yes, the new ones, the strawberry ones.
I got two full box sets of them to throw into the crowd.
So did you get your hair done today?
Looks great.
No, I need my hair done bad.
Look at this shit.
Oh, hell no.
The only thing that's annoying about having the bleach
is you got to do it like every fucking week.
It's so annoying.
It's so annoying.
I low key want to find, I want to find someone out here in LA who like lives close to me and
like a hairdresser that could just do it for me because I'm like, it's just like, I don't
know, like it's not that it's that time consuming, but it's just fucking annoying.
Like I just want to like, I don't want to have the hair all over my floor and then
there's fucking pear shit everywhere in the bleed.
I'm like, ugh, I would like to just have someone once a week
do it for me.
Maybe I'll find a hair salon near me or something.
But then also too, they better not play
and be like, yeah, that's going to be $300.
So I need someone to do it for the low.
Because if I'm coming every week,
we could work out some sort of arrangement.
We could work out some sort of arrangement.
You know what I mean?
We could work out an arrangement.
You'd be surprised, you'd be surprised
how much you'll charge.
You'd be surprised.
But yeah.
Here, my C-roll can I make Christina do it?
Oh, no, no, I just, like, it's just the luxury,
It's just the luxury of like, sitting in a salon chair
and having them wash your hair for you.
Like, it's just nice, it's just nice.
And then I don't have hair all over me
and hair all over my bathroom once a week.
Like, it's just nice, it's just something nice.
So, you know?
But going to a salon to get your head shaved,
like, where am I going to the barber shop?
That'll make it even worse.
Okay, this, okay, if I had to go into a barbershop tomorrow, hold on.
Okay, this is supposed to be a barbershop background, don't we?
So I'm not hearing any buzzers.
Okay, there we go.
raining for some reason. Okay, we find a better one.
Okay, this is actually like a real heart shot, okay.
Yes, one hair cut, please.
Yeah. Just...
So just, can I, let me do a one and a half all around.
Clean me up on the edges back here
and then a bleach in tone.
Do you know how to do a bleach in tone?
No?
Okay, that's okay.
Just, okay, just do the cut then.
We'll just do the cut.
Okay.
We'll just do the cut.
Okay, perfect.
You can sew right now?
Okay, great.
Let me, I can sit.
Okay.
Thank you.
So, how's your day, man?
Good, that's good.
Oh, don't look.
Okay, look straight ahead.
Okay.
So, how long have you been cutting hair?
Right.
Right, right.
Um, where are you from?
Nice.
Oh, yeah.
I know a lot of people from there, too.
That's cool.
Oh yeah, I know a lot of you open there too.
Sorry, stop moving, okay, sorry.
Alone in the room, I do.
Can you do the beard too?
Can you do my beard?
I'm just messing with you.
Wait, you can do my beard?
Wait, no.
I think I have, okay.
Um, okay.
Anyway.
Um, no, but you literally, okay, first and foremost,
they don't got Dominican hair salons out here.
They don't have Dominican hair salons out here.
I mean, I don't really have hair anymore,
so it doesn't really matter.
But there is not somebody's auntie with the most natural BBL,
and by natural, I mean doesn't have a BBL.
Like somebody's auntie with the best bill you've ever seen,
giving you the best blowout you've ever had in your life
in about 20 minutes tops.
They don't have that out here.
They don't got that out here.
And that pisses me off
So yeah, well, I don't have hair anymore so it doesn't really matter again, but I
Missed that
And now out here you go for a friggin
Blowout
$80 and the shit sucks
Fuckin' bullshit.
Fuckin' bullshit, bro.
Just absolutely BS.
80 bucks to blow who?
Yeah, fuck it, do the bush at that point if you charge an 80 dollars, fuck, get every
piece of hair on my body.
Also too, oh my god, I literally, like, genuinely, I feel like every time I'm in
I feel like everyone has had this experience before where like they've been like they've just gone absolutely fucked at a salon and like
Overcharged and like okay, so there is this one time that I wish I had pictures of it
there was one time this was like years and years and years ago
I had to have been like 17 years old and I
Went into this salon and it was like a nicer salon like I saved my money to like go to this
Certain salon because everyone always would like hype this damn salon up. So I go to this fucking salon, right?
And I'm gonna let you guys watch Lady take a bath.
I go to the salon and I show this lady some inspo pictures.
I wanted to go lighter.
Mind you, my hair at the time was already light brown.
Like it was not like fucking,
you would think it was box dyed black
the way that this woman was like, oh no, we can't.
Like she was like, okay, I can get you lighter,
but it's gonna take like at least five sessions.
Mind you, my hair was like light brown.
I was like, oh, and I didn't even want to go that much later.
I wanted like a fucking balayage.
I was like, oh, okay.
I was like, okay, well, we could like,
just as much as we could do today.
This bitch, okay, this bitch
had me at the salon for six hours.
I swear to God, I leave there.
My hair is maybe, I'm not even kidding,
like a half shade lighter than it was when we left.
And when I got there, and it was so patchy.
The highlights were so patchy.
I was like, and of course I'm like 16, 17,
so I'm like not fucking,
I like saved all my fucking money to come to the,
it was like $350.
And I was, she was like, yeah, like,
and I was like, okay, yeah, okay.
And so then I literally,
and then I remember posting about it
and like sending pictures to my friends
and being like, am I bugging or like, does this suck?
And they were like, yes, this, like, what the fuck?
And then I called them, I was like,
hey, like this shit is fucked up.
I was like, I need, like, I don't know,
we need to figure something the fuck out.
And they were like, okay, like,
you can come back and she could do it again.
I said, no, no, no, I don't want her to do it again.
I want my money back or I want someone else to do it.
And then I went back and then they gave me like,
a senior stylist, like someone who knows their shit.
And then she got me right.
Cause I was like, what the fuck?
You're not about to sit here.
And that was even, that was even me back
when I was like non-competitional.
But still, even when I was,
I was not about to let that slide.
Oh, absolutely the fuck not.
Um, JoJo Johnny with the $50 Dono Haven, I got my very first tattoo last Thursday and
that ho is so itchy.
Any advice is helpful to help because I'm dying here as I try not to claw at my bloody
skin.
Sending love from Australia.
Bloody!
It shouldn't be bloody!
It shouldn't be bloody!
A week!
A week into it!
It shouldn't be bloody!
So careful!
Um, slap it though a little bit of, a little slap, but bloody is where I'm, I'm hoping
You're just being dramatic. Oh
Clawed my bloody bloody skin
Australian I got it. Okay the slang not literal bloody
That's a knee slapper right there. Oh my god. Okay, that is frigging funny. Okay, so
Disregard that so slap it and
Just make sure that you're that you're lotioning that bad boy up just making sure you're lotioning that bad boy up
Um, yeah, because it the it's your it gets is like when it's dry, I feel like and it has to like dry a little bit
Like it's gonna get flaky regardless, but just just lotion that hoe up
Just lotion that hoe up with a with an unscented lotion unscented. It's like a plain unscented lotion
And a little aqua four is your friend too fucking do a little aqua four on it too
Nothing scented though, but don't over moisturize it. Don't do don't don't do nothing crazy
But yeah, thank you for the $50 don't know JoJo Johnny
Yeah
Breast milk also helps. Okay, well not everyone just has that readily available to them.
Sasuma, Maka. Not everyone just has that readily available to them.
Like, still doesn't speak for yourself. Like, okay. I don't know. And honestly, even
if you did tell me that breast milk was good for a tattoo, I don't even know if
I would do that. I don't know if I would do that. Yeah, I don't think I would do that.
Anyone got a breast milk plug or what? I had pink eye once and breast milk got rid of it. Okay,
well, who's was it? That's my next question.
In the eye. In the eye is kind of great. No, okay, I'm sure it does work because it's like
all like you know it's the natural and it's yes and I've heard that like when
babies have like you could put it on their skin and stuff too but okay if it's
my oh okay if it's my own titty milk I would really be like this I would if I
had if I had if I had pink eye and it was my own titty I would literally milk
myself like a cow like who cares it's mine but I'm just like okay I don't know
if I am gonna do that with like a random person's tinny milk or even like a
family member or friend like I don't know so I don't know about that I also
really want to milk a cow I need to put that on if I start this new YouTube
serious I need to put that on there milking a cow remind me that I want to
do that and isn't there that that person on tiktok on the ballerina whatever the
fuck they were like selling raw milk if there's something they all got sick or
some shit like that what the hell I saw something with that what happened with
back
As a farmer child cows stinky, well, I would imagine they are pretty stinky, but
Ballerina farm, yeah
Raw milk is literally just poop milk. Oh, but they would all drink and get real. It's disgusting
nasty
nasty nasty nasty
But um, yeah, I people got E. Colage. I'm like, what the fuck is wrong with you?
Um, nasty.
And when you see that calendar, think about how you said 30% chance you beat it up.
Okay, I'm gonna keep that in mind.
I'm gonna keep that in mind.
I will.
Okay, but remember cow tipping?
people didn't people used to do that like you could just tip them over like easy
wasn't that a thing it's not like a real thing or was that just in barnyard or was
that just like a fucking in the movie
oh it's from the cars movie I was like I know it's from some movie my mom used
a cow tip? Why? And then how would they get back up? That's mean.
My god.
And how would they get up with their legs? But they're all round and robust.
How would they get up like they can lay down okay, but I don't know I just thought like
Like there's some animals that when they roll over they need to be helped
They need a little more help to get back up I don't know
I
Okay, I knew it was in barnyard. I knew it was from okay, so it's like
Okay, I want to see I want to see a cow fall over and
See him get back up make sure that he's like, okay
This pussy he didn't even do shit I
I want to make sure the cow can get back up. Okay
Okay, well see that's just different. He's just like now he's fucked. How is he getting up out of there?
Poor guy
No, why are they why is he pulling him I don't like that
Apparently maybe it's not real then, maybe it's not real.
Maybe it's not real, so it is real.
If I catch any of you tipping a cow, then I would have a 30% chance of beating up.
Just know that you're going to get it.
Oh, a Winnie from El Veys.
But I can't milk Winnie, right?
Winnie's not a milky cow.
Winnie's not a milking cow, right?
Winnie's just a girl.
She she need a baby to be a milking cow
Oh
The more you know the more you know
Did I just do I don't know I don't know bro, I brew
I don't know bro. I grew up in fucking Connecticut, bro, and not like the part that had
And not the part that had, um, cows. So I don't know.
Grew? We're going to steal the sand moon!
Alright, Grew. Alright, Grew. Like, alright, Grew. Alright, Grew.
Alright, Grew.
Yeah, like I don't know anyone who has a cow or a friggin farm
Like
Why don't we say the second second C in Connecticut?
Connecticut
Connecticut
Connecticut
Oh
The second C
Connect. Oh the second one
Connecticut. Oh, true. The second one. Right, right, right. Connecticut. I don't know why we don't, because that sounds stoopid.
Because that sounds stoopid. Okay, should I go to this party or what? Like, it seemed like it was going to be Lit Turn City.
city my phone's also on six percent or five now perfect and
but the thing is is that i don't okay well i know i know a few people there
i know a few people there
but i'm going alone
and it's like okay am I just gonna like go alone and be like hey I'm just like
hope that like people are gonna be like cool because of that I'm like you know
you know what I mean and it's also at someone's house but it's like a big
party so I'm like I don't want to just be like I don't want someone to think
that I'm gonna be like up their ass all night you know like that the few
people that I do know there? And then what if like no one... Wait, let me see.
No, it's not me being anxious. I'm genuinely just like, because, okay, it's someone's birthday party, but I don't know the birthday person that well.
But it's a big party, so I'm just like, but I know, I know if I go have fun. That's the thing. It's just a matter of like, do I want to get up? Do I want to get dressed?
to like do the whole kicking the bootle right now.
Also, I should charge my phone.
So I'm just going to plug it into this.
You know, this is probably going to charge at 0% speed.
But it's better than nothing.
Let's just see.
I'm awake.
I just saw, I just saw someone else that I know is on the list.
So I just said, are you going just to check the vibes?
Just to check the vibes real quick.
Let me see.
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, I'm sure it'll be a fun time.
I'm sure it'll be a fun time. What is this?
Okay, okay.
Okay. I thought I might just go. I might just go.
I think I'm just gonna go! Why not?
Guys I'm not gonna fucking stream it. I don't even, did you not hear what I said?
That I don't even, the person whose house it is, I am,
and it's a friend of a friend. I'm gonna be like, hey, hey, hey!
Gamera in y'all's face.
Yes, young hoe activities.
True.
Okay, but that's the thing. I'm like, I don't even want it like I don't even want to I
Don't even want to okay if I go right now. I don't want to be I don't want to be like I
Want to dress like Adam Sandler. I
Want to dress like Adam Sandler? Is that okay with y'all?
I'm gonna dress like Adam Sandler
That's really all I have up my sleeve.
That's all I have up my sleeve.
I guess let's just do, okay, let's just do,
let's do a quick beat.
I gotta make a bag right here.
Let's do a quick beat.
And watch how, watch how, watch how I do this.
Watch how I do this quick beat, okay?
For everyone's like, make a tutorial, make a tutorial.
Oh, I'm gonna show you right now.
This is my, oh, we gotta go right now?
This is my, oh, we gotta leave right now?
be okay 30 minutes give me 15 okay I'll probably I'll take my I'll probably take a
sweet my sweet time but no I'm not gonna wear sweats I'm not gonna wear sweats I
do need to like at least some sort of pant or something okay so this is my
quick makeup routine let me drink some more water
I'm probably going to wear like a jor or something, okay.
So let's start with a little primer, Fenty.
Okay, that's a hard star.
Oh, that's a hard start. Okay. And then also going to put a little bit of primer, a little
bit of powder just put in my mouth. Where's my eyeshadow primer? I believe genuinely I
don't even really need it because I'm going to put like the tiniest amount of eyeshadow
on so it really doesn't matter but it just makes me feel better having it on.
Okay, can't find it. We don't need it. We don't even need it. We literally don't
even need it. Okay.
She ain't got time to read it correctly. What? I read something.
Okay. Why is she frozen? Hello? She's fine. Read the pin. There is no pin. Wait, is there
Are there a pinned comment right now?
Well there was, oh it's gone.
Dang it.
Okay.
So I'm gonna just do a little bit of shadow.
Just a neutral, like a light neutral, just to brighten up.
That's a hard shirt.
Oh, thank you Dylan.
Courtesy of Dylan.
And so will my my merch designer
Okay
So it doesn't really make that much of a difference, but it's just to kind of like even out whatever is on my eyelids
That's really all we're kind of going for and then
Maybe if I'm feeling a little crazy
Even just throw a little light brown in the in the crease
Why not?
Okay.
Are we getting crazy?
Don't let her off.
I can't take her nowhere.
She's so crazy.
Okay.
Then we're going to go in with, if I could find it.
If I could find it.
Great.
Is it not in here?
Oh, that's perfect.
Okay.
So I have this...
Oh, no, it's right here.
Yes!
Milk Hydro Grip Tint.
So it's like a foundation, but it's not like super heavy.
It's good if you want like a no makeup makeup, but like so with some coverage, boom, a little
bit of that, and I'm using you guys in my mirror, so hope that's okay with you.
Shade two or three, dare I say four, so it is a little darker than, it does, it is
It's a little bit darker than my skin tone, but it ends up being, it blends, it blends
out okay.
It'll be okay.
So I should use shade three, it's four gets a little bit darker once it oxidizes, but
it's fine once I put the, once I put the concealer on, it's fine.
Okay, boom.
Blender.
Peanut butter baby, hey. Hey.
You're not gonna wet that? Nah, it'll be all right.
I'll be fine
You look like a quail egg on the nest way, okay, okay
Katie me does your makeup then that would be fun too
Or we do each other's makeup or maybe Katie turns me into her and I turn Katie into me that could be cool
A little bit jaundiced this evening.
Give me a second.
Please give me a second.
It will all work out in the end.
You have to trust me.
You have to trust me.
Okay.
Then we're going to go in with a little bit.
Sorry, I keep hitting the mic.
And then we're going to go in with concealer.
Just kind of put that wherever.
I don't even care, bro.
That'll be fine.
An artist at work.
Okay.
Uncle Fester drag, okay.
Guys, I
Haven't added any color to it yet. Okay once I add the color it'll all come together
Because once I add the blush, I don't want to hear y'all switching up, okay?
I don't want to hear y'all switching up saying, oh my god, it's so cute!
Fuck you.
Okay.
Now a little powder.
Where's the puff?
Where's my puff?
Found it.
My chin!
Oh my god, thank you!
Almost forgot
Yeah, that'll do.
Okay, and while we're waiting for that to sit for a few seconds, I'm going to do this.
I'm going to get...
So how is it?
My hands are so slippery.
My hands are so slippery.
I'm running out, I need more.
Now I let this sit.
Okay, this thing is on its last leg though, I need to get another one.
Dust this powder off.
A little bronzer.
So, I'm going to start with a little bit of water, and then I'm going to add a little bit of salt.
.
.
.
.
.
This is where I get a little tedious with it, blush, but listen we go in layers around
here because I don't play about my blush.
So I start with Miss Arianka, pinking of you.
This goes all over.
Okay, doesn't look like much, but that's why we layer.
Nars, thrill.
That's pink.
Then, Patrick Ta, it's broken, but she's a doll.
bottom one. Too much. Wait, hold on. Where's my other buffing? I need to buff it out. That's
Too much!
Wait, hold on.
Where's my other buffing?
I need to buff it out.
That's okay.
It buffs out pretty nicely.
Where's my buffer?
Where's my buffer?
I'm gonna probably use the bronzer.
brush will be fine
And a little shimmer.
The way I use like the same brush for like everything is so bad.
Like I don't give a damn.
hose use the same brush for everything. Okay. Then my handy dandy Lottie London brow bleach
Pencil pen gel thing
Love this thing
Bum bum bum
And that's how you clear a bitch.
And then they should sit on for a few more minutes.
I should let this sit for a few more minutes.
And then wait, hold on.
Okay.
Okay.
Boom, boom, boom.
It peels.
It peels all along.
Yes.
OK, I really don't even want to use this color because I,
how long would I have to use?
I can't find another one, yeah?
That'll be fine, though.
Just to blend it a little bit out.
I didn't want to do it so much, but this is a lit mask,
but I don't care.
I'm just going to put it on.
Brush your hair before you leave.
How can I forget to do that?
do you want the house tour that could take you wait actually
Do you want the house?
I want the house too.
Okay, see, and that's how you do it, how long was that?
How long was that?
Does anyone time that shit?
Around 20?
20 minute beat.
No, and that's it, that's it.
This is like a good little everyday.
Something simple, something easy,
something breezy, something covered girl.
But yeah. Okay. And then, okay, I'm going to bring some outfit options into here.
I'm going to bring some outfit options into here. Hold on.
Okay, so I said options, but I literally picked out one thing, and I'm just hoping that it's
That's fine, so hold on.
Okay, on second thought, I think I want to wear my 69'sh.
Hold on.
I'm going to see if this looks good.
Wait, do I have to work?
How big are these?
Okay, big ol' gene.
And they're so wide on the bottom, I love them.
Okay?
And then hold on.
I have a black bra. I don't know where it is. I have two bra. Okay, hold on.
Thank you.
Okay.
And it's like, ruched, see?
It's so fun.
Woo!
Okay.
Honestly, a cunty little like pointed black toe boot would be so good, but I don't know
if I have.
Actually, I'm lying, I do.
Okay, I know I said I wanted to go Adam Samler and then I kind of went with this, but whatever.
I don't like having the sleeves tight, so I'm just going to leave them open like this.
Hold on, let me get my boots!
My boots!
My boots!
Hold on.
I'm hungry, I need to get a snack on the way.
You need to talk about, like, hi, can I get any, um, okay.
Okay, hold on.
Hold on.
Awesome, go after it.
Remember I told y'all, remember I told y'all that, oh, guys, my eyes are up here.
Remember I told y'all that I got the chrome farts glasses, because I wanted to see if
I liked them before I spent money on the chrome hearts glasses.
parts I got fake ones to see if I want if I wanted to get the real ones but I was
talking with the real one so you know I had to do it to them
yeah no so these are the real ones these are the real ones and they're such a
cute frame color they're like kind of see-through but they're like brownish
They're almost like a green tint. They're so cute.
I like these.
And then I need some earrings, but...
Normally I would do silver with this kind of outfit, but...
Um, I already have my gold necklaces on, so I don't give a damn.
So...
I don't know, I'm not taking them off, so...
I'll probably just throw some other earrings in, I don't know.
Okay, well that's my outfit, dude look at it, we got ready to go 30 minutes, 30 minutes
and I'm probably going to stay out for an hour, so it doesn't even matter, okay, well
love you, when is the party start, oh it started an hour and a half ago, so I got
to go, so I'm going to go, okay love you, I'm going to have fun, thank you for
hanging on a random ass stream night.
I will see you Tuesday.
Tuesday is a sponsored stream,
so that's another reason why I was like,
let me just come on here and give y'all another stream
just so it's not too sponsored stream back.
Sponsored streams back to back,
but Tuesday sponsored stream is a makeup brand,
so we're gonna do makeup
and then play some games after.
So it'll be fun, it'll be fun.
But I'll see you guys on Tuesday, okay?